FBI Background Checks...

Since FBI Background Checks have been in the news (ahem) lately, to include what they are, and what they aren't, I thought I'd weigh in on the subject a bit.  I'll admit it was quite a few years ago, but once upon a time I had a Top Secret Crypto Security Clearance.

That was, BTW, the absolute highest, tippy-top Clearance one could receive, except for "Special Access Handling," the rating Ms. Clinton violated repeatedly with her little server fiasco.  The rating that lists all our foreign spies and agents.  That one...

The One that was Soooooo Super Special that I didn't even know it existed until Hillary's little private-server-in-the-bathroom fiasco.

Yesiree, folks!  Your friend and mine, me, The Chuckmeister, was invited to join a Special Band of Brothers back then to gird our loins and sally forth into the abyss to Help Stamp Out Communism!  And we did a pretty fair job.  Sort of.  

And don't give me that old "Military Intelligence" gag again.  

But prior to being permitted to partake in this incredible opportunity, I was put through an exhaustive FBI Background Check.  Exhaustive!  Some of my old buds back home in Chillville might recall having received a visit from a couple of those "Men in Black" types, and being peppered with questions about yours truly.  

Anyway, those questions were comprehensive.  And they haven't changed.  They ask respondents about your friends.  And then to those people they ask for your enemies.  And so on. They ask if you had an alcohol problem.  Or a drug problem.  Or gambling (ahem!) or women (ahem!) problem.  Anything that might compromise you to an enemy.  Anything!

I subsequently learned they interview at least 40, and as many as 100 people for each background check!  The more "sketchy" info about you they receive, the wider their follow-up grows.  And they document each interview, one after another.  But they DO NOT draw any conclusions from the information thus gathered.  Rather, they present the data in a proscribed format and then provide a summary for the Agency that requested the check. 

Most recently, that "Agency" was the Senate Judicial Confirmation Committee, the bunch that ordered up the "Supplemental Background Checks" on then-Judge Kavanaugh.  That made a total of 7 separate FBI checks the Judge had undergone by that time.  And all of this unfolding while every Democrat in the D.C. zip code was calling on, neigh pleading with good female citizens everywhere to drop a dime on the Young Kavanaugh to save the Republic while there was still time!

So if there's anyone else out there in InternetLand who still wonders about Kavanaugh's guilt or innocence, lemme' tell you I'd consider it impossible to undergo Seven such checks over a period of 26 years for far more sensitive positions than I ever occupied (sorry, Fan Club!), and not have had any whiff of trouble pop up.  Not a whiff.  Nothing. Nada, zip, zilch.  

And that was like catnip to the Democrats on the Committee.  With no drugs or booze or wife beating or insanity to focus on, they went straight to the High School Yearbook.  And to oh-so sober, straight-faced questions such as, "What's the real, nefarious meaning of "Boofing?"  "What about the "Devil's Triangle?"

Are you kidding me?  Does anyone out there besides me think it would be a good idea for the Democrats to start electing grown-ups for a change?