Monday, May 27, 2013

The "Chicago Way"

Have you ever thought you might like to live in Chicago?  You know, that "City of broad shoulders," as Poet extraordinaire Carl Sandburg so famously described it. 

Multi-million dollar apartments on ritzy Michigan Avenue, wonderful pubs and eateries on Rush Street, truly awful weather, whether in the summer or winter, or anytime of the year, for that matter, perhaps the very best way to spend a day at the Museum of Science and Industry, and, of course, one big damn place to arrive and depart at O'Hare Airport.  BTW, did you know that O'Hare was named for Butch O'Hare, the WWII fighter pilot ace that exemplified everything that Chicago has since turned it grimy back upon. 

Leave it to me to come up with a segues that twists your minds...

Yes, Chicago.  A town that hasn't elected a Republican since Dwight David Eisenhower was Prezz.  Chicago.  A town once owned by the bootlegger barons and depression-era goons, and then by Mafia gangsters, is now owned and controlled by the unions and the lefty political machine they spawned and pay for.  Chicago.  The 3rd largest American city is, except for Detroit, the poster child for how not to run things.  Chicago.  A town run by ward heelers like the guy who decided Chik-fil-A couldn't open any more restaurants there because it's run by religious zealots who don't favor homosexual marriage.  Deeply in debt, Chicago is the very capitol of underhanded political double-dealing.  If you're not a crook, or if your daddy isn't a crook, there's simply no way you'll get a job in this broad-shouldered town.  And this is the place in which Barry O'Bama chose to settle after (possibly, maybe, maybe not, who knows?) graduating from Harvard Law.  How quaint...

So yes, if you've ever thought it might be fun to live in Chicago, guess what?  You do!  Everyone in America now lives in Chicago, or, better put, a suburb thereof.  That's because the "Chicago Way" is now writ large over all of our lives.  And we have proof of that with the multiple scandals now unfolding in Foggy Bottom. 

It starts with "Fast and Furious," that little gun-running effort whereby we bought and paid for millions of dollars worth of "assault weapons," whatever they are, which were then provided to straw buyers, and then on to those fun-loving Mexican drug cartels so they could kill each other and various and sundry civilians.  And, hopefully, a few Americans so Barry's famous admonition to the Mexican Assembly in 2009 that "90% of the guns in Mexico come from America," which is patent horseshit, could help to spur us to demand our elected representatives to erase the 2nd Amendment from the Constitution. 

And then we have Benghazi.  Our Fearless Leader was somewhere the night of September 11, 2013, but taking care of insuring our Ambassador and three other patriots were safe that night wasn't on his agenda.  He had to get a good night's sleep so he could jet off in my airplane to Las Vegas to go raise some campaign cash the next morning.  And so four of our citizens were brutally murdered while Barry snoozed.  And what about Hillary?  We don't know.  She got a call from the Ambassador at 2:00 a.m., begging for help, but she did absolutely, positively...nothing.  Remember her famous campaign ad about Barry getting the 3:00 a.m. call?  Me too.  President Hillary?  Me thinks not. 

And then we have the IRS clamping down on groups desirous of having a voice in the way their country is being run.  The scum!  Any group with the name "Tea Party" or "Patriot" were singled out for scrutiny, and their applications for 501(c)4 tax-free status were uniformly denied.  Or simply ignored.  One group out of Texas, which didn't much care for unfettered abortions in America, were queried about to whom they prayed and exactly what they said during those pesky prayers.  I'm not joking.

Other questions this organization and others like them were asked included:

     - Tell us what books have you read in the past three years, and give a book report on each;

     - Give us copies of all your sent and received emails, letters and tweets for the past three years;

     - Tell us who you associate with, have associated with, and plan to associate with over the past three years and for the next three years;

     - And my personal favorite, "Will you promise not to lobby or advocate for conservative causes if your application is approved?"

Fun folks, those IRS types.

And then there's the AP, and now Fox News, DOJ scandals.  Our boy Eric Holder signed off on a subpoena to tap 20 phone lines at an Associated Press office, in which 100 journalists worked, so he could find out from whom they were getting their leaks.  And he did the same to Fox's James Rosen, in a chillingly brash slap in the face to the 1st Amendment's freedom of speech guarantees.  And then on 5/23 he testified to Congress he knew nothing of such activities, never approved them and would never have anything to do with something so blatantly unconstitutional. The Chicago Way means being able to lie when the truth sounds better.

And let's not forget the NLRB.  Barry illegally appointed three members to the National Labor Relations Board while the Senate was in recess, except the Senate wasn't in recess at the time.  And we know doing so was illegal, because two separate Courts of Appeal have since said so.  And this makes hundreds of decisions made since by the NLRB all illegal.  Fun.  Oh, and the NLRB refuses to stop its activities or send home the illegally appointed members.  Ballsy, these crooks are.

And the EPA?  Oh yeah, these folks are particularly nasty in their partisan approach to what should be a straightforward protections of our environment.  Yeah, they protect us all right.  They protect the Left from the Right, crapping on conservative causes at every turn.  They have so far put more than 10,000 coal miners out of their jobs in seven Mid-Atlantic states, as an example, because they just don't like coal.  Simple.

So, my friends, you don't have to move to Chicago.  You already live there!  And you now are experiencing what it's like to be governed by a bunch of self-dealing, hypocritical thugs.  The only good part of this whole, unfunny deal is that the crime rate in Chicago, with exception of the gun murder rate, which is through the roof, even though there are no guns in Chicago because they outlawed them, has gone down since November  4, 2008.  That's because all the really big crooks have moved to D.C....