Friday, October 14, 2016
Have you seen the Internet ad that reads, "Jimmy Fallon Speechless?" You know, the one with Lucy Liu's face smiling wide, inviting you to click on the pic and learn why Jimmy was left without words?
Or the one with an older Asian gent who's eyes magically go from puffy to perfect in seconds with only the addition of some "miracle" cream?
Or the one where Christie Brinkley and Dr. Oz open the metaphorical doors to eternal youth for you via some little bottle of something?
And all of them, ALL OF THEM, can be yours for an absolutely "free 14-day home trial" at the absurdly low cost of just $4.95 to cover "shipping and handling." Sounds impossibly great, doesn't it? It should, because it is. A friend of mine just fell for this scam. And friends, it is a scam! Here's how it works:
After you've been reeled in, the ad, usually on Facebook or as a paid-for ad on a website you visit, will require you to fill in your vital info, as in name, address, etc. before you get any more data. Then you'll be required to "tic" the little box indicating you've read and understand the rules governing this amazing offer. And so you do, because everybody "tics" the little box without actually reading the rules and regulations. Right?
What happens next is murderous. You give the ad your credit card number and click the "apply" button. A couple of days later you get your "miracle" bottle of something or other in the mail. You start using it. You don't notice anything like the "magic" results that Lucy or Christie or the Asian gentleman experienced, but at least it only cost $4.95 to give it a try. WRONG! If you don't call the number, which is usually hard to find, or mail back the product so it arrives within the 14-day "trial" period, your credit card will be billed an OBSCENE amount!
In the case of the Lucy Liu ad, you'll be dinged $129.95 for that little 2 oz. bottle of goop! Others of these scam ads will charge $89.95 or even more! And you'll automatically be sent another one each month until you call and cancel. And it may be several months before you even realize you've been had! And they won't take back the product after the 14 day trial period elapses! You're basically screwed, and it's all your fault!
A friend of mine got had via this scam. I offered to try and help. I spent a painful 2 hours on the phone with some guy named "Steve." He was with this company's "fraud department." Strange, don't you think? A little vitamin and supplement company with a "fraud department?" Of course, if you're engaged in a fraud, you'd need a fraud department.
Anyway, Steve and I had a long shouting match. He threatened my friend with felony fraud and mail tampering if he tried to get out of the deal. I threatened him with conducting an Internet scam. I told him I would call the police and the FBI and the CIA and the highway patrol. I finally won this little tete-a-tete by simply informing him that my friend had notified his credit card company and instructed them not to honor the charges. In fact, I advised my friend to cancel his card and ask for a new one. Good ol' Steve, recognizing that his little scam operation would have to follow through with all those threats if he wanted to try and get back the $347.89 he'd lifted off my friend, seemed to give up at this point. He grudgingly signed off from the "fraud department," unhappy, but resigned to losing this battle with an unhappy "customer."
Here's a little advice:
1) Read the fine print, regardless of just how fine it is.
2) Be on the lookout for scams any time you do business over the Internet.
3) And finally, if it sounds too good to be true, it almost always is!
As for me, The Chuckmeister, I've decided I look just fine the way I am. Because at these prices, I just can't afford to look any better...
Monday, October 3, 2016
Unless you've been living in a dumpster behind the local Wal-Mart, you know that 2nd string, has-been quarterback Colin Kaepernick, who used to play for the Peoples' Republic of San Francisco 49ers football team, has decided that he no longer will show due respect for America's National Anthem or its flag.
Yes my friends, and you are my friends, Kaepernick was playing in top form when he emerged on the scene back in 2011. He could throw tight spirals and he could scamper. He was a double-threat. And because of this he was given a multi-year, $120 Million Dollar contract.
But then 2013 and 2014 happened. No longer quite so good. Relegated to second string. 49ers hired new QB. Kooperdick was no longer the fair-haired boy. Actually, being a mulatto, with a Black father and a White mom, he never was. But maybe that fueled the furor in which we now find him...and us.
Kopperprick was facing a trade. He was going to be fired. And so, what was he to do to remain relevant? To keep his face all over ESPN? Relegated to collecting only $100,000 a month while warming the bench (!), it's my opinion he just couldn't abide the fate of no longer being important. Of no longer being the go-to guy. What was he to do?
How about giving America the finger? Yeah, that's it! Dump on his Country! The Country that gave him the chance to be a star. A filthy-rich star. Yeah, crap on his Country and its flag! He could say that "his people" were being mistreated. Being treated unfairly! Even though Blacks represent more than 70% of the players in the National Football League, and making $Millions, he thinks they're being mistreated. And until they are given better treatment, in his sole opinion, he would not show respect for his Country or its flag by standing, hand on his heart, when the National Anthem is being played.
To say that this caused a furor would be an understatement. the NFL's CEO, a guy named Roger Goodell, decided that Klopperdank's disrespect was quite alright. Goodell wouldn't approve the Dallas Cowboys players wearing patches honoring the five slain Dallas cops, but okayed Kramperdork dishonoring our Country and its flag. The fans didn't like that decision. Especially when a few other Black athletes decided to stand with Kummpledrek. Or, rather sit.
One Ms. Megan Rapinoe, fiercely gay and damned proud of it, and star midfielder for the soccer team Seattle Reign, decided to join forces with Klipperdork and take a knee during the National Anthem. To prevent her from doing so again, the owner of another team due to play the Reign, ordered the Anthem played before the players took to the field. Upon learning of this, Mr. Megan was overheard to say, "Fu**ing outrageous! Nice. Do you kiss your mother with that mouth?
And Denver Bronco's star running back Brandon Marshall decided to join in as well. He decided to display his displeasure with earning several million dollars a year while being Black by refusing to respect his Country and its flag. A couple of his sponsors responded by immediately pulling their sponsorships. One, a credit union serving veterans exclusively, pulled out, costing him more than $5 Million a year. I wonder if he expected that? I wonder if he's proud of his decision now?
There have been others. And it's still spreading. But the theme is just the same. Filthy rich Black athletes have decided that they don't need to respect their Country or those who have died defending it. And there are legions of us fans who have decided that we don't need to support these athletes or the teams for which they play so long as they choose to act in such a disrespectful manner. Klapperdingle can exercise his right to free speech any way he wishes.
And the fans and I can choose to withhold our dollars from further enriching him - and his team - in any way we can. And I, for one, choose to do exactly that.
Personally, I would suggest that Mr. Kleppledirt adopt that old adage: "Better to be thought a fool than to open one's mouth and remove all doubt."
But punishing those who disrespect America is, to me, not the point. What, I ask, has happened to my Country? What has happened to make our citizens choose to engage in such overtly dishonorable activities? Activities that draw negative media attention to them and to their teams and their sport? Activities that are undertaken with no apparent thought about what backlash might befall them?
I have a theory. Bear with me while I set the table...
The Vietnam War, or rather "Police Action," as it was then called, ended in 1972. And the draft, or forcible conscription of citizens over the age of 18 into one of the military branches in the event of national need, ended soon after that. That's 54 years ago. Long enough ago that 2/3rds of our citizens weren't alive back then. Long enough ago that we as a society do not remember what it meant to have to purchase your freedom - and keep on purchasing it - by picking up arms and going off to war. Long enough ago to not be required to honor our Country or its flag. Long enough ago that we now consider it routine for less than 1% of our population to defend the other 99%. And that's because our military forces are made up of volunteers. In effect, paid "mercenaries." In effect, professional soldiers who volunteer to serve, and in many cases, continue to serve as a chosen career.
So back then, and before, all the way back to the Revolutionary War, we were all in it together. Now? Not so much. We're well into the second generation of adults who no longer have to fear conscription. Who no longer need to worry about writing a check to their fellow citizens in the amount of up to and including...their lives. I did. Did you? Probably not. Krippledank, and Rapinoe, and Marshall? Absolutely not. They feel they are due what it means to be an American without having to pay any price for that honor. For that privilege. What a shame.
They don't seem to realize that they've already won the human lottery. They've already been born into the 5% of the world's population that enjoys a level of freedom unknown around the globe. A freedom that's been bought and paid for by legions of their forebears who laid down their lives in payment. But they're too damn dumb to know how good they've got it. And we all know that items for which we pay no price have to us exactly that same value: Zero.
When I was paying the price for our freedom, the guy to my left and to my right stood with me. They had my back and I had theirs. They were not Black or White, nor any other color, creed or sexual proclivity, for that matter, but simply fellow soldiers. They came from rich families and from poor. They came from the north, and the south, and east and west. Some were smart, and some less so. They were a cross-section of our society. And with so many being drafted, we had millions of ex-service members who could inculcate a sense of paid-for freedom into brothers and sisters and sons and daughters and uncles and aunts and friends and neighbors upon returning home.
Today? That sense of service is long gone. Unlike the citizens of Holland and Israel and Switzerland, to name but a few, the US of A no longer conscripts its strapping youth to enter into the service of their country. And the result? An entitled society. A society of people who worry about trigger warnings and "safe spaces" so their tender feelings won't get hurt. A society of those who do not value their freedom because they paid no price to obtain it. A society of soft, wussified wimps who make old-timers like me want to puke.
I believe that those by-gone days were better days. You may disagree. If so, that's okay with me. That's some of the freedom I bought and paid for that you get to benefit from for free. But this is a warning. When a society grows paunchy and soft, with those who no longer deserve the title "patriots," it may well die of atrophy. And my fear is that we're well on our way toward that ignoble end.
Please prove me wrong. The next time the National Anthem plays, stand up, put your hand over your heart and sing along. The next time you're asked to stand and recite the Pledge of Allegiance, do so loudly and proudly. And compel those to your left and right to do so as well. And the next time some poor misguided fool disparages our great Country, loudly admonish them for their transgression. And if any privileged dumbass like Colon Klimpledreck decides to shame himself and his family by refusing to honor his Country, show him how you feel by turning off the money spigot for him and his team. It will be acts like those which just might keep us from wasting away into nothingness.
If you agree, pass this along to your friends. Ask that they do the same. We patriots need to overwhelm the wusses. We need to shame them into either becoming good, solid 'Muricans, or to simply keeping their disrespectful actions to themselves...
Monday, September 26, 2016
In advance of tonight's first Presidential Candidates Debate, I'm predicting that we'll be blessed with all manner of memorized factoids from Democratic Candidate Hil(liar)y Clinton. In spite of the hot, glaring lights and the stare of the unblinking TV cameras, I am predicting that she will spout, from memory, all sorts of myriad facts about all manner of arcane subjects important to her vision of how to further micromanage America into a quivering shadow of its former greatness.
One would therefore have to assume that Mrs. Clinton has a pretty good memory. You would have to think so, but you would be wrong.
A contradiction? Sure. Explanation? My pleasure. Read on...
The chances that you'll ever hear a knock on the door and it will be the FBI are pretty remote. But if it ever happens, I have all the information you'll ever need to escape whatever fate might otherwise befall you.
The answer to any question the agents might ask you is as follows:
"I'm sorry sir, I just can't remember."
We know this to be true because that's the answer one Ms. Hillary Clinton gave her FBI interviewers on the Friday before Labor Day weekend. They asked lots and lots of questions, and 35 times she answered, "I just can't recall." And that's why FBI Director James Comey had no choice, he said, but to not recommend a referral for an indictment for all kinds of nasty felonies to his boss, Attorney General Loretta Lynch.
We all heard his 15 minute excoriation of Hil(liar)y during the press conference four days later. 14 minutes of it were all about what a lying, scheming, careless, unprincipled, dishonest crook she is. The last minute was about the fact that, even so, he just couldn't bring himself to charge her.
We, The People, were not satisfied. Neither was Judicial Watch, a watchdog organization that holds politicians' feet to the fire. They sued the FBI for the written notes from that Saturday interview. Those notes, although heavily redacted, were finally forthcoming. And here are the questions Hil(liar)y could not bring herself to answer. All the things she could just not recall (comments in parentheses are those of the Chuckmeister). She couldn't - or chose not to - remember:
1. Whether or not she received a security clearance and whether or not she retained it while Secretary of State. (Really?)
2. Whether or not she received security training while at the State Department. .(She signed a statement that she did).
3. The process of selecting or designating targets for drone strikes.
4. How data on her Blackberry(s) were destroyed (the FBI discovered she had 13 Blackberry devices, and several were destroyed with a hammer (!). (Remember when she swore to us she had only used one, and only because of "convenience?)
5. What constitutes secure cell phone usage with State Dept. staff. (We now know that she could not make or receive cell phone calls from her 7th Floor offices at the State Dept. She had to leave the floor and go the 6th or the 8th Floor to make or receive calls, and all were unsecured!)
6. Whether or not emails with classified information had been sent on unsecured communications channels. (Given that they all ran through her personal, home-brew server, some 100,000 of them, that would be some major thing to just forget)
7. Anything pertaining to conversations she may have had about setting up a private email account. (Since she paid for it, I wonder who she thinks might have done it?)
8. Email policies in the Foreign Affairs Manual. (Did she ever read it?)
9. The reason her request for a Blackberry from the State Dept. was denied.
10. The names of any aides who had access to her Blackberry and email accounts. (It would appear all of them did)
11. The procedure for deleting her emails. (For us it would be to hit the "delete" button. For her it would appear to be a team of highly-paid IT people and some of that "Bleachbit.")
12. Any emails she may or may not have sent regarding server storage limits.
13. Any offers she may have received from aides to obtain clintonemail.com accounts besides Huma Abedin.
14. Any compromise of aides' Gmail accounts.
15. A cable about Bryan Paglio's upgrade of her private email server. (NOTE: Paglio has been granted immunity by the FBI, yet still won't appear, even though subpoenaed on multiple occasions by Congress. He must have some seeeereeus information he refuses to share, even though he cannot be punished for any involvement in any crime. Something to do with all those 40-plus Clinton bodies stacking up, maybe?)
16. Whether or not she may have used an iPad mini. (There are multiple of pictures showing her using it)
17. Specific email a.
18. Specific email b.
19. Specific email c.
20. Specific email d.
21 Specific email e.
22. Specific email f.
23. Specific email g.
24. Specific email h.
25. Specific email i.
26. Specific email j.
27. Specific email k.
(Since they were all redacted by the FBI, we'll never know what information they may have contained.)
28. Any information regarding the procedure regarding the receipt of a secure fax.
29. Any information regarding Freedom of Information Requests for her email usage.
30. Any further access of her private email usage.
31. Any specific information about her security clearance.
32. Any information about the archiving of her emails.
33. Anything about her legal team's separation of her private and her work emails. (I mean, there were 55,000 designated as public, and 33,000 labeled as personal, and another 15,000-plus we were not told about that the FBI found and released. And they were all separated at her direction. That would be kind of hard to forget, right?)
34. Any conversations she may have had about Federal records keeping regulations.
35. The content of any State Dept. briefings she may have had following her concussion in 2012. (One of her excuses for her poor memory was a "concussion" that she sustained. As reported by NBC, Hil(liar)y stated she could not recall the details of briefings that she attended due to a concussion she sustained after a fainting spell in 2012. And that "concussion" occurred just days before she was due to testify to Congress under a Federal subpoena. Timely, huh?)
So, my friends, and you are my friends, the woman who wants you to send her back to the White House, as both President of the United States, and Commander-in-Chief, with her finger on the nuclear trigger, and bring former-President and hubby Billy Jeff "Blue Jeff" Clinton with her, seemingly could not remember much past her own name. One could state that such a failure to remember, especially by a trained lawyer who knew she was facing indictment for numerous felonies if she lied to the FBI, avoided such a fate by simply failing to remember. I guess you cannot lie if you do not remember. I'm going to pack that bit of information away for future reference. All it seems you have to do to avoid getting arrested, charged, tried, found guilty for a Federal crime and sentenced to an 8' x 10' cell in scary Leavenworth is to simply forget your involvement in that crime.
Imagine how different it could have been: FBI: "Tell us, Mr. Dillinger, why did you rob that bank?" Dillinger: "Bank? What bank?"
To paraphrase Dana Carvey's SNL Church Lady character, "How conveeeeeeeeenient"
Friday, September 23, 2016
According to Dictionary.com, "Imponderable" is defined as:
Adjective: "Im - pon - der - u-bul" That which cannot be precisely determined, measured or evaluated."
And that's remarkably true in this day and age of "political correctness." Political correctness, or "PC," prevents us from learning the answers to questions which directly effect our lives these days in so many, many ways. Questions such as:
Why is it that a person of mixed race, such as one who's half-Black and half-White, is always Black? Take our President, for instance (please!). He's half-Black and half-White, yet he's "Black." He says so. Everybody else says so. So he must be. So why is it that he's called "Black?" Why isn't he White sometimes? Say, Black for a week, or a month, or a year, then White for the next week, or month or year?
Remember Halle Berry? She's the Black actress who won an Academy Award way back when. And, Oscar in hand, and White mother in the front row, remember how she gushed at how happy she was to be the first "...Black woman to win an Oscar since Hattie McDaniel did for "Gone With The Wind?" Hmmm.
Or then there's Colon Kramperdick. He's the washed-up, tatted-up, has-been quarterback who sits on the bench and collects his $110,000 a month from the Peoples' Republic of San Francisco Forty-Niners NFL football team. His Black mother gave him up for adoption. Then he was taken in and raised up, pretty well it would seem, by White adoptive parents. Yet, he terms himself "Black" and is so pissed that "his people" are so mistreated here in good ol' 'Murica that he refuses to stand for the National Anthem or pay his respects to the flag of his Country. That would seem pretty damn disrespectful to me. But hey, I'm just a loyal, respectful, patriotic, flag-waving, red-blooded, God-fearing American. Like you are, most likely.
Other imponderables would include why is there a Congressional Black Caucus but no Congressional White Caucus? And why is there a Black Entertainment Network and no White Entertainment? And why is there a National Association for the Advancement of Colored People, but no National Association for the Advancement of White People? Or, no United White College Fund when there's a United Negro College Fund?
And better yet, why can we no longer call Black people Colored, or Negroes, when those used to be the preferred terms, and when those names are in the titles of the above named charities? Who makes the decision to change these things? Which guy, or guys, or gals, or "its," decided one day to make it no longer proper - or "PC" - to call Black People what they used to call themselves? Where are they located? When do they meet? And why don't we all get a voice in such matters?
And here's another one of them there imponderables: Where is that "Black Community" they keep talking about? Is it in Watts? Or Compton? Or maybe at the corner of Florence and Normandy? Or Baltimore, maybe? Why don't we White people have a community? It would seem to me that there's some White folks out there, like those who live in Missississippppi, or Appalachia, for instance, who are pretty far down the evolutionary tree. Don't they deserve a community?
And, why are there hyphenated Americans? There are African-Americans and Native-Americans, but there are no Irish-Americans or Italian-Americans. Are we not a preferred voting bloc here in 2016 America?
And speaking of African-Americans, our POTUS, one Mr. B. Hussein Obama, is not an African-American. He's more accurately an Arab-American. There's only 6.25% of African blood coursing through his Community Organizing veins. Since 50% of Barry accrues to his White mother, the other 43.75% of Barry's heritage is definitely Arab. Don't believe me? Where do you think that name "Hussein" came from?
And speaking of Arab names, did you know that "Barack" was the name of Mohammed's horse? That's the one he road through the sky from Mecca to Jerusalem and back to Mecca during the so-called "Night Journey" that took place 10 years after he became a self-described prophet way back during the 7th Century. And, my friends, Mohammad was definitely an Arab!
So, my friends, shouldn't Barry consider himself an Arab-American, at least 40% of the time?
So, these are but a few of the many imponderables banging around in my aging brain like a BB in a boxcar. Perhaps you have a few as well. If so, please feel free (or at least inexpensive!) to send them along. I promise to share them with my tens of loyal readers. You'll get credit for them, of course. Until then, these are the things political correctness keeps you from being able to say...or even think!
But I, the Chuckmeister, can!
Sunday, September 18, 2016
Remember a few years back when B. Hussein Obama and his Mini-Me Attorney General Eric Holder got caught slow-walking thousands of so-called "assault rifles" across the border into Meheeeeeko?
In what was called "Operation Fast and Furious," the Justice Department authorized tens of $Millions out of the nearly $1,000,000,000,000 (that's One Trillion, with a "T"!) Stimulus Program to be used to buy AK-47's and AR-15's. That Plan was designed to get us out of a recession with some of those "shovel-ready jobs." Except, as the Community Organizer-in-Chief was forced to later say, "Those "shovel-ready jobs" weren't so "shovel-ready" after all, were they?"
The "Fast and Furious" plan was to give the dough to numerous unemployed twenty-something losers who would then go into three gun stores along the border between Meheeeeko and Arizona and Texas. These slackers would go to the gun shops and buy a dozen or more of these deadly weapons at one time. The gun store owners, ever suspicious of such activities, all called the FBI. Just like they were supposed to. Just like they were required to. They were told by the FBI to go ahead and sell the guns to these straw purchasers! They were told that the FBI was going to follow these guns after they were sold and nab the Bad Guys somewhere down the line.
Except, they didn't.
And thus, more than 2,700 AR-15s and AK-47s were lost by those who were supposed to be watching them. That means, more than 2,700 of these weapons, that you and I bought and paid for, went directly into the hands of the Mexican drug cartels. I'm sure they were appreciative.
Obviously, the Alcohol, Tobacco, Firearms and Explosives (ATF) arm of the Justice Department, the FBI's boss, doesn't think that a bunch of bozos buying a few thousand AK's and AR's with cash money poses much of a problem...
So why did this happen? A few of you might remember that shortly after his immaculation, Barry Obama addressed the Mexican Congress. During that speech he made the comment that fully 90% of all the guns that were rattling around Meheeeeeko and being used by their murderous drug cartels to kill thousands of their innocent citizens came from the United States. Now you should know that the comment he made was a gigantic bag of unadulterated horsh**t. Apparently Obama either doesn't know that AK's and AR's are manufactured in more than 100 countries these days, and that most all the guns winding up in Mexico are coming from one of those other places, or he was lying through his artificially-whitened teeth.
But lying is apparently no longer held in contempt in Foggy Bottom. If it ever was, that is. Hil(liar)y and her disgraced hubby, Billy Jeff "Blue Dress" Clinton, has raised lying to an art form. Remember when Billy Jeff was disbarred for lying about his little "encounter" with Monica Lewinsky in the Oval Office? The same one that resulted in him being impeached and disbarred and his law license revoked? The same one that resulted in him being fined $85,000 for lying under oath and rendered more than $900,000 in debt to his lawyers for keeping him out of jail? No? Maybe because a whole lot less of today's electorate was of voting age back then. Very few of the so-called "Millenials" will remember this stain on the Presidency (Stain. Get it? I thought you would.) But, given we're in the throws of electing our next President, and it just might be Hil(liar)y, a reminder would prove timely about now.
So I'll let you decide which it is. Was Obama completely ignorant of the facts, which is bad enough, or just guilty of premeditated, unadulterated, flat-out lying to the American people?
I'll go with lying.
Anyway, one of the guns thus provided to Meheeeeeko's drug cartels was used to kill Border Agent Brian Terry in December, 2010. And the Administration found itself with mucho huevos on its lying face. The gun-walking stopped with a screech! Obama and Holder did their very best to change the subject and avoid the blame they obviously so richly deserved. And the Lap Dog Media did its best to assist them. As happens these days with the 24-hour news cycle, new problems replaced the old ones. The gun-walking scandal was forgotten.
Until the massacre in Paris, that is...
News Flash! One of the fully-automatic AK-47 "assault rifles" used by an Islamic jihadist terrorist to murder more than 150 innocent civilians and wound 350 more in Paris last November 13th, appears to have been sold, illegally, without repercussion of any kind, as part of the "Fast and Furious" gun-walking scheme.
Let me repeat that: One of the guns used in the largest terrorist attack in generations was bought and paid for by you and me, America's taxpayers, and then "slow-walked" into Meheeeeeeeeko by those under the orders of your President and then-Attorney General. And then somehow made its way across "The Pond" and into the hands of an Islamic jihadist terrorist murdering thug.
"A "Report of Investigation," or ROI, filed by a Case Agent in the ATF, a part of the Department of Justice, tracked the gun used in the Paris attacks to a Phoenix gun owner who sold it illegally, "off the books," Judicial Watch's law enforcement sources confirm."
According to Judicial Watch, a watchdog group, a paper trail left, in part, by a 4473 Form - which tracks a firearm's ownership history through serial numbers and other means - traced the weapon to a Phoenix seller who had previously been caught dealing in illegal weapons. Judicial Watch would dearly love to make public the name of the seller, who had twice previously been caught for federal firearms violations, but the ATF, who hand-picked him to do some of that slow-walking, would not divulge his identity. They apparently fear that doing so might anger the seller and cause him to "go public" with the facts relating to the Government's complicity in illegally running guns to foreign drug cartels!
In short, your Government was indirectly involved in killing scores of people in a Paris concert venue. This is the same Government that, under the orders of Gun Grabber-in-Chief Barry Obama, is doing its very best to rewrite the 2nd Amendment in an effort to make it tougher for you to defend yourself and your family. To make it tougher to buy and keep and bear the weapons you and I need to keep our families safe. To make it tougher for you to exercise your Right under the Bill of Rights.
Those doubting the facts presented here are invited to visit Judicial Watch's website (judicialwatch.org). But please do so before eating a meal. It might cause you to lose your lunch...
Monday, September 5, 2016
"South of the border, down Mexico way. That's where I fell in love where the stars above, came out to play."
Remember that song? It was Number One on charts back in 1956 when one Mr. Frank Sinatra chose to record it. Great song. The country down there, however, has fallen on some very hard times since "The Chairman of the Board" chose to honor it.
Flash forward six decades...
So as we all know by now, The Donald moseyed on down to Meheeeeeko Citee a couple of days back to meet with their El Presidente.
Yes, my friends, and you are my friends, Trump was issued what I believe to have been a perfunctory invitation to come and visit by their Prez, Enrique Pena Nieto. One was sent Hil(liar)y's way as well. So much has been said about illegal immigration and drug cartels and building a wall that Nieto issued an invite to both to come visit.
Only The Donald took him up on it. And I'm pretty sure El Jefe Neito was surprised. And probably scared s**tless. There's no question in my mind that Nieto expected neither candidate to respond positively. He's in such a mess down there I think he was doing anything he could to try and improve his tanking poll numbers. But only one week ago Trump said "Yes," and they started scrambling to make the necessary arrangements for his visit. Put simply, hating Trump as they do, his fellow countrymen were not pleased with his invitation. Nor with The Trumpster's acceptance.
Anyway, whether at the behest of the Secret Service, or simply due to his desire to keep his ass attached to the rest of his body, The Donald decided to rent a nice new, stark white (isn't that racist?) Bizz jet to ferry him down Meheeeeeko Way. No "Trump force One" this time. I'm guessing he was concerned about becoming the bull's eye for a heat-seeking Sidewinder missile sent skyward by one of their ubiquitous drug cartels. Remember, you're not paranoid if they're really after you.
So The Donald and Prez Nieto held a press conference. You might have noticed that, following diplomatic decorum, there was a Mexican Flag behind Nieto on that stage, but there was no American Flag behind The Donald. I have a theory about that little "oversight," and here it is:
The Mexicans do not believe that there really is a United States of America. And that's because 168 years ago they owned a good chunk of what would become America. It was call Astlan. Or Alta (read "upper," or "high") California. It stretched from way above what's now the Peoples' Republic of San Francisco, north across the top of Utah and Nevada, and dipped down through Oklahoma and on to encompass most of what is now Texas. They called it Tejas, as in "Tee-haas," by the way. The Mexicans owned vast rancheras (big-ass, multi-thousand acre ranches) here. They raised their cattle here. They built missions here. They lived here. And then they began to screw with us and our people as we moved west. Bad move.
Their banditas, like Senor Pancho Villa and his boys, began stealing our cattle. And stealing our women. And robbing our trains and our banks. In short, they were causing mucho problemo, and we decided up with that we should no longer put (with apologies to Yoda). We declared war. It was called the "Mexican-American War," catchy, right? Because, technically, they started it. But we ended it...
The War officially came to a close via the Treaty of Guadalupe Hidalgo of 1848. It gave us all of Alta California. It could have given us much, much more. In fact, it could have given us all of Meheeeeeko. And there were many in D.C. at the time who felt it should have. We could easily have annexed our neighbor to the south. And maybe we should have. Because we had them on the ropes, as they say. But the more circumspect in power back then felt that taking on Mexico, then, as now, a Third World Country (I'm sure they would disagree with that opinion), would have meant biting off way more than our young country could fiscally chew. And maybe those who felt that way were right. But that decision has laid the foundation for the debate in which we now find ourselves...
In short, Mexicans don't believe they were treated fairly by that Treaty. They don't believe that they should have lost the northern third of their country. They don't even believe that the border that exists between our two countries is, in fact, a border! If you pick up a map of Mexico, from Mexico, you'll note that the border between us, most generally the Rio Grande River, all 1,869 miles of it, is called "La Frontera." The Frontier. They don't consider it a border. They consider it a nothing more than a speed bump on the freeway between their people and a high-paying job in El Norte. A hurdle over which they have to jump to get to where they ought to be able to go without impediment. It's theirs! So why should they feel guilty about breaking into our country, if they don't believe our country is our country? In short, they don't!
Now, for purposes of background, those who follow this unassuming little blog will note that I have written on this subject before. And I have related in-depth about Meheeeeeeko's draconian laws concerning illegal immigration. But for those unfortunates who have never had the chance to inculcate those nuggets of information (maybe they were being held hostage by a band of roving Gypsies!), let me give you a short briefing on how our Southern Neighbors view this trendy little subject:
- If you break into Mexico, without permission, you get a two-year stint in one of their maximum security prisons. No passing "GO," no collecting 200 pesos. Then you get deported. If you're still alive, that is. If you decide to come back (bad idea!), you get ten years, hard labor. Not something one should want. Most likely a death sentence.
- Whereas Senor Nieto seems to think exporting their poor to America, one-way, is a really good idea, they don't seem to feel the same way about their neighbors to the south. They've dug trenches all across their borders with Guatemala, El Salvador and Nicaragua, and then filled them with uniformed soldiers and machine guns pointed toward potential border-jumpers. They will judge with extreme prejudice those who try and do to them what they routinely do to us. Think on that for awhile, my friends.
- Meheeeeeeko's Number One export is oil. And oil prices are down. Thus, Meheeeeeko's economy is down. And so is Prez Nieto's popularity. Number Two source of income is "remittances." These are the $25 Billion Dollars or so in annual earnings that come back home from illegal workers who take "jobs Americans won't do," and then send the money they illegally earn back to momma in Guadalajara. It has been opined that their economy would quickly tank if these remittances were to stop.
- If you decide to emigrate to Mexico, it will take you many months to gain approval from them to do so. To get a visa you must prove you are financially stable and will not become a drag on their economy (!). You must prove you are either independently wealthy, or that you are employed and your employer guarantees that they will support you during your entire stay, and oversee and pay for your repatriation back home should that prove necessary.
- Once there, it will take you at least six months to secure a driver's license. You must take driver's lessons from an approved vendor. Those lessons are expensive, costing at least $1,600, which is a fortune to a Mexican. You must maintain insurance offering coverage at least double what Mexicans now maintain.
- You may not own land within 50 miles of any body of water. Oceans, lakes, rivers, streams, tributaries, no matter. If it's a body of water, you, Gringo, can't own land nearby. You may only purchase land through a third-party land broker who will hold that land in trust for you for what's usually a 50 to 98 year period. It then reverts back to Meheeeeeeko. America's richest man, one Senor Carlos Slim, owns a big chunk of our country (newspapers, TV stations, cell phones companies, etc.) and is buying more every day. We don't seem to share their view on foreign ownership of assets, so we?
- You may not join the armed forces. You may not become a police officer. You may not be permitted to learn to fly a plane, or pilot a ship, or engineer a train. You may not run for public office. You may be a member of the clergy. You may not attempt to sway public opinion. You may not petition the Government. You may not protest. You may not wave signs or placards. You have no freedom of speech. Any Mexican citizen may arrest illegals at any time, and for any reason, or for no reason. You are basically expected to work and earn and pay taxes and keep your miserable foreigner mouth shut.
- Once you finally get your visa, if you violate it, you're guilty of a felony and are subject to a six-year term in one of their better prisons. Good luck with that.
- Mexicans are given preference in hiring over foreigners. Even legal ones. Period.
- Member of both houses of Congress, and the President, and their Supreme Court must all be natural born Mexicans.
- Although their constitution provides their citizens the right to own and keep firearms, a right virtually impossible to exercise, by the way, you, as an emigrant, have no such right. You not only may not own a firearm, you may not own even a single bullet! In fact, being in possession of a spent brass cartridge, already fired, is considered a felony and it will give you a one-way ticket to one of their infamous Gray Bar Hotels for a multi-year sentence.
- And finally, according to Meheeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeko's immigration laws, and these are direct quotes, you will be barred entry or continued residency if your presence "...upsets the national demographics." You cannot be granted legal residency unless you can prove that you and your dependents will be "...a useful element for the Country," that you will "...contribute to the national progress," and that you have "...the necessary funds for sustenance."
Whatever you think of The Donald, or Nieto, or Meheeeeeeko, or illegal immigration, or "the wall," or Hil(liar)y's promise to make legal all illegals within her first 100 days in office, you simply must embrace One Simple Fact: What's good for the goose simply has to be good for the gander. If Meheeeeeeko thinks its immigration system is so superior to our own, I suggest we simply adopt theirs. And then let them bitch and moan and complain about how unfair we are to their compadres...
Oh wait. We can't. The Democrats will not allow any such tightening of our immigration laws because that would deprive them of a never-ending supply of brand-spanking new voters. And the Republicans will not allow any such tightening of our immigration laws because that would deprive them of a never-ending supply of cheap, reliable labor. This, my friends, is how we got into this problem, and why we'll likely never get out of it.
But it's sure entertaining to watch the back-and-forth on the campaign trail as the candidates tilt at these age-old windmills, and each other, isn't it?
As for me, November 8th cannot come soon enough...
Tuesday, August 30, 2016
Didja' hear about Anthony Weiner sending another of his infamous social media messages to some babe? Yeah, this bozo really, REALLY likes to take selfies of his semi-erect trouser snake and send them to unsuspecting women who are unlucky enough to have an Instagram or Twitter account.
He did so five years or so ago and wound up losing his Congressional House seat. His wife, Huma Abadin, famous Muslim right-hand Tonto babe to Hil(liar)y Clinton, is, and soon it appears to be, was, Weiner's wife (say that five times really fast!). She stuck with him through his first indiscretion, hoping, no doubt, that Anthony would find something else to do with himself. Pun intended.
Then, a couple of years back, he again succumbed (heh, heh) to his unfortunate little predilection and sent off another shot of his turgid lap rocket to some unnamed babe. He did so under the pseudonym of "Carlos Danger," presuming, I would guess, that no one would recognize him.
Let's see here. He was a Congressman in the most heavily populated place in the Nation and had his famous nose of, shall we say, gargantuan proportions, plastered all over the media for months and didn't think anyone would recognize him and his gigante burrito? This boy is a special kind of dumbass!
Anyway, caused all kinds of hell, it did. Huma, possibly because Tony was then running for Mayor of New York City (really?), decided to once again brush off his hobby and stick around. Tony lost his bid to get past the primaries and wound up on the ash heap of ex-Mayoral candidates. No Gracie Mansion for him.
And by the by, it's worth noting that the ultimate winner of that contest for Mayor was one Big Bill De Blasio. Billy Boy, as you may know, is six foot-eight or -nine - or ten all-out proud communist who proved as much by honeymooning with his new Black, 4 foot-tall communist activist and poet wife Charlane in Cuba. Oh, and yeah, be formally backed the Nicaraguan Sandinistas. At least he was consistent in his politics. Consistently wrong, I would opine.
And his primary platform position for Mayor was to eradicate "stop and frisk," which made the City safe after years of being the "murder capital," improving relations with the NYPD, at which he has failed miserably, and getting rid of all those nasty smelly horses who pull those delightful white hansom cab carriages around Central Park. Been a disaster as Mayor, has this bozo. Crime is up, tourism is down, taxes are up, services are down...and the horses are still thrilling crowds around Central Park. Cops hate this guy. Rightfully so.
Back to the main story...
Oh, by the way. By then Anthony's weiner had produced another little Weiner. And so, he and Huma had a little boy to think about. Maybe he should have thought about that little Weiner instead of the other weiner...
And now, five years, later, VOILA! Anthony Weiner takes another selfie sitting on his bed, in his BVDs, with his little boy by his side, and his famous tan banana barely sheathed. And he sends the selfie off once again to some woman with whom he had been conducting an Internet back-and-forth for over 14 months. Made the cover of the New York Daily Post yesterday, it did. Caused quite and uproar. I don't know about you, but I would be kind of embarrassed by something like this. But then again, I wouldn't have done it. Anthony's not beset by a big helping of common sense, it seems.
So, his wife, Huma, published a tearful twitter message (how does one get all tearful on twitter?) about how upsetting this all was and stated that she and Tony were separating. She immediately took off her wedding ring and got back to the main business at hand of getting infamous serial liar and socialist multi-millionaire Hil(liar)y Rodham Clinton elected to POTUS.
So, ever on the lookout for a new business opportunity, I got to thinking. How about some of us get together and buy a bunch of hot dog carts. Maybe 15 or 20. They cost maybe $5,000 each, so you do the math. And we name them "Anthony's Weiners." Get it? Heh, heh. And under the sign with the name on it we put a picture of good ol' Tony in a Lone Ranger (Carlos Danger) mask with one of our new hot dogs in his, ahem, other hand, with the caption: "Picture this!" Like it? I just new you would.
Of course, in addition to the $100,000 or so we'd need for the carts, we'd need, say, another $1 Million to grease the skids. You know, polish the palms of the Street Vendor Commission, and the Manhattan Burrough President, and the Mayor's office, and the Parks and Recreation Commission, and the Food and Beverage Commission, and the Street Cleaners and Curb Polishers International, and the Union of Professional Graft Takers, etc., etc.,etc. I mean, we know this works! The Donald had to pay Hil(liar)y Clinton and hubby Billy Jeff "Blue Dress" $One Hundred Thousand Dollars to induce them to attend his daughter's wedding.
Worked for him, and them. Could work for us...
So, if you're interested, get in touch and we'll put a marketing plan to together and start raising the cash necessary to do business in the new Peoples' Republic of New York City. I think we should start by sending off a substantial contribution to Billy "Big Bird" De Blasio's reelection campaign.