Monday, December 28, 2015

We Are The Militia!

Ever heard of Joseph Michael Arpaio?  No?  

Well, my friends, and you are my friends, he's the Sheriff of Maricopa County, Arizona. More commonly known as "Sheriff Joe," Arpaio is known as "America's Sheriff" for his unusual, irreverent, politically incorrect and uncommonly successful methods to punish criminals while also reducing recidivism.

Sheriff Joe runs the jail in Maricopa County, Arizona.  This jail features an outdoor tent city with a big neon sign stating "OPEN," 24 hours a day for all to see.  The prisoners are forced to wear demeaning pink underwear, which is probably all they need considering the temperature much of the year hovers around 125 degrees. The prisoners farm their own food and run their own hog farm.  Joe feeds them whatever they grow, along with baloney and mayo sandwiches at a total cost of $0.36 per prisoner per day.  You read that right: Thirty six cents per day!

Yes, Joe is a special sort of guy.  And he's earned the wrath of the ACLU and Liberals everywhere as a result.  As an example, that pack of weenies at the ACLU sued him for refusing to provide TV for his "guests."  So, he set up cable and offers the inmates two channels: the Weather Channel so they can know exactly how hot it is, and The Disney Channel, so they can watch Snow White and Mickey Mouse. I'm a big fan of Arpaio, to put it mildly.  But now more than ever as a result of his most recent suggestion, which I'm now passing along to you.

Your President, one Mr. B. Hussein Obama, blames global warming, which isn't occurring, and our failure as a nation to provide "meaningful gun reforms," which they can't define, for terrorism on our shores.  

Now, the temperature, in my opinion, shouldn't really have much influence on whether a nice Muslim lad decides to shoot up a church or school or community center.  I mean, it gets pretty hot in Singapore, and Costa Rica, and Perth, but they don't take to terrorism as an outlet for their frustration. Perhaps it's because they and their entire family, will get summarily shot if they do.

And legally bought-and-paid-for guns shouldn't have much influence either.  If you buy them legally, passing the firearms safety test, and all required FBI background checks, and then wait the proscribed period before picking them up from the dealer, as the killers did in San Bernardino, enhanced background checks shouldn't have any effect on whether a hell-bent Muslim jihadist terrorist murdering thug decides to commit acts of mayhem, or not.  

Oh, and by the way, those "enhanced background checks" are already in effect here in Taxifornia.  We're already doing what Barry and his Sycophants want us all to do, but it was here, in Taxifornia, that the Muslim jihadist terrorist bastards followed all the laws that Liberals want to impose and still shot up the place.

But our Golfer-in-Chief disagrees.  He thinks that making guns harder and more expensive to buy for good, solid, honest, God-fearing 'Muricans will somehow have an impact on criminals...who by their very definition don't obey the law!  That's Barry's prescription, dumbass as it is.

Mine is quite a bit different.  And it is based upon Sheriff Joe's idea.  Here it is:

America has 12,500,000 people at present with Concealed Carry Weapons permits. That's almost 5% of our population. Now, that's not spread equally between the 57 states (Obama said he'd visited all but a couple of our "57 states" during his 2007 run for POTUS.  If he says there's 57 states, who am I to disagree?).  Some, like Florida, have many. Almost one million, in fact.  Others, like New York, and Connenneccticuttt, and Neu Hersey, and Maryland, have very few.  That's because they have leaders who apparently can't read and understand the 2nd Amendment's plain language regarding the Right to "keep and bear arms."  But Arizona has 250,000 Maricopa County concealed carry permit holders alone among Arizona's 6,741,374 residents. And Sheriff Joe wants to mobilize them.

Arpaio believes, as I do, that trained, experienced and legally-permitted CCW holders can become a very positive and welcome, adjunctive force to the police agencies within their sphere of influence.  Our Founding Fathers, with George Washington as leader, called upon the Minutemen to bring their "assault weapons" (i.e., muskets) and report for duty as a "well-regulated militia" when needed. That's what "well regulated" meant: of fighting age (18), able-bodied, and with weapons they owned at the ready (our nascent Republic didn't have any weapons to issue because it didn't have any money!).

They were shopkeepers, blacksmiths, doctors, lawyers, teachers and butchers.  But first, they were Americans!  And if they were needed to support and defend their young country and its residents, they were ready, willing and able to do so.

And they were needed to repel the British in our Revolutionary War.  We kicked their bangers and mash-loving asses, to put it mildly.  And we did it because we had the backing of our armed citizenry.  And we could do that again.

Oh, and speaking of what - or who - constitutes a militia, the California Code clearly specifies that, "The militia of the State consists of all able-bodied male citizens...between the ages of 18 and 45," and the Governor - even a wimp like Jerry "Moonbeam" Brown - commands it be so, whether he likes it or not.  

Back to the point:  We know that Bad Guys don't want to meet their virgins until they've had a chance to kill lots and lots of innocent people (ever wonder what those virgins must look like after 1,400 years of waiting?).  And they won't get that chance if they attack well-defended locations.  Ask yourself: why don't Islamic jihadist terrorist murderous thugs try to shoot up gun shows and police stations and gun stores? Because they're defended by an armed populace, that's why!  Put another way, if only 5% of the ducks were armed, do you think anyone would go duck hunting?

Might be a good place right here to throw in one of my favorite gun quotes as a palate cleanser.  James Earl Jones, famed actor and octogenarian says, 

"Better to have a gun and not need it, then to need a gun and not have it."

So, if you were wondering why the Bad Guys chose a "gun free zone" training center for the developmentally disabled in the Once-Golden State instead of say, Texas, or Florida, or Utah, or Arizona, or Oklahoma, or any other of the 31 states that "shall issue" concealed carry permits, you now know the answer. And if you have ever wondered why virtually all the mass shootings over the past 20+ years have occurred in "gun free zones," you now know the answer.  And you now have the answer as to how we, the American people, can put these murderous Godless thugs back on their heels: Turn America into a modern-day, armed militia, just waiting anxiously to be called upon and given the opportunity to send these goat-lovers packing.  

Because We are the Militia!

Caveat:  First, I do not advocate untrained, uninitiated and unstable people carrying and/or using guns, nor do I wish them to have access to same.  I believe that anyone, anyone who chooses to buy a gun be required to undergo sufficient training and practice so that they are totally competent and reliable when deciding when - or if - to unload on somebody.

Second, I believe that fielding several hundred thousand armed and trained Americans would literally scare the hummus out of smelly camel herding nere-do-wells.  I believe that they would choose somewhere else - anywhere else - to try and terrorize besides a place where it is known that the people are to be considered armed and dangerous. So, the result would be no terrorist attacks!  And isn't that the desired goal?

Oh, and those who disagree with me should show their distaste and condemnation for us Troglodytes by putting a really big sign on their front yards announcing to all, 

"I hate guns!
I don't own a gun!
I will never own a gun!
Thank you, and have a nice day."

I'm guessing the NARMBT (National Association of Robbers, Muggers, Burglars and Thieves) would really appreciate such a notice.  Don't you agree?

I'm doing my part.  Are you?  

Sunday, December 6, 2015

Doctor POTUS' Prescription to end Terrorism. Or not...

Believing that he, the POTUS, one Mr. B. Hussein Obama, has not been on TV enough of late, has decided to address the nation tonight, Sunday, December 6th, 2015.

And I, the Chuckmeister, wish to time- and date-stamp this little blog entry of mine in advance of that momentous occasion so that there's no question as to what I predicted he'd say and what he chose to deliver to us, his fawning electorate.  Let's see just how prescient I, the Chuckmeister, your loyal scribe, really am.

Yes, my friends, and you are my friends, Barry will take a few more moments of our precious time to lecture us on what he thinks we need to know.  According to media reports, he'll tell us about terrorism, and what we, the American people, need to do about it.  

I predict that he'll infer that it is not his fault!  No, it can't be his fault because he's been busy closing coal mines and "weaponizing" the IRS to punish conservative organizations and playing golf and taking expensive little tax payer-paid Martha's Vineyard vacations and apologizing for America all over the planet to have actually been responsible for the rise of terrorism.  

And I predict that he'll tell us the fault is not with Muslims! No, terrorism in the name of Islam is just a perversion by a few well-meaning but misguided fellows who are acting out because they don't have jobs.  Or maybe their camel has dyspepsia.    

Having painfully listened to each and every one of Barry's thousands of proununciamentos over the past seven-plus years, I believe I'm uniquely qualified to provide you, my faithful readers, with a calculated guess or two as to what sort of meaningless blather he'll spew.  And so, with due humility and an enduring faith in God and the inherent goodness of my Fellow Man, here goes:

1. He'll blame George W. Bush:  Yes, if it wasn't for Chimpy McBushhitler, we would never have invaded Iraq or Afghanistan.  And we would have never opened up GITMO to house all those nice, misguided Muslims who were just wandering around the battlefield somewhere and were somehow scooped up unfairly and placed in this awful hell-hole of a jail there in balmy Cuba. Yes, it was Bushie's fault.

2.  He'll blame Climate Change:  He'll somehow try to tie the rise of radical Islamic jihadist terrorism, alive and very well for more than 1,400 years, to the Earth's warming. Of course, the Earth isn't warming and hasn't been for almost twenty years.  And the seas aren't rising.  And the icebergs aren't melting and the Polar Bears aren't drowning. But hey, what's a degree or two among friends?  I guess the desert in that toilet of a region is getting hotter, and that makes radical Islamic terrorists more prickly and even more likely to cut off our nonbeliever heads.  

3.  He'll blame guns:  Yes, he'll tell us that guns, and the NRA, are a big BIG part of terrorism world-wide.  Were it not for the NRA, Barry will tell us, then we Americans wouldn't want to own and use guns.  And then, somehow, these murderous thugs who shot up San Bernardino last Friday, wouldn't have managed to get guns and wouldn't have killed 14 and wounded another 17 more.  But some of us might want to consider that France doesn't have an NRA, and those misguided members of the Religion of Peace killed 140 and wounded another 300+ in Paris the other day.  But that's just me. 

Oh yeah, and this otherwise very nice middle-class SanBerdoo couple had 12 pipe bombs.  But, since there's no National Pipe Bomb Association to blame, Barry won't mention that.  

And even though it's been reported that all the guns were all purchased legally, with full NICS-system FBI background checks, and ten-day waiting periods, in a state with arguably the most stringent, painful, unnecessary, awful, miserable, expensive and time-consuming gun-hating laws in the country, Barry won't care about that and will call for even more stringent, awful, painful gun control laws.  I guess, according to Barry, the only way to keep Bad Guys from getting guns is to keep Good Guys from getting guns.  Go figure!

4.  He'll blame Republicans:  Yes, my friends, if it weren't for Republicans, then he, Barry, the mild-mannered POTUS, would have been able to pass "reasonable, moderate, meaningful gun control laws" a long, long time ago, which would have somehow prevented these nice Muslims from buying guns and shooting people.  Oh, by the way, "reasonable, moderate, meaningful gun control laws" is Democrat-speak for a Federal, national data base of all gun buyers and owners so that at some unspecified date in the future, the Black Helicopter Squad can come visit your home in the dead of night and confiscate your legally bought and paid-for guns.  And don't think I'm being paranoid.  It happened in Cuba, and China, and Britain, and Australia, and France, and Austria, and Venezuela, and Russia, and North Korea, and - ready for it - 1936 Germany.  

And, my friends, just because you're paranoid doesn't mean they're not really after you.

Annnnnnd, he'll propose to do a whole bunch of illegal and unconstitutional Executive Actions to further his gun-hating pronouncements.  One will be to close the so-called "gun show loophole."  That's the one where you can go visit your local gun show and buy a beat-up old .22 single shot rifle mano-a-mano from some elderly grandfatherly-type for your son for Christmas.  No, my friends, after Barry's new E.O., your ten year-old son will have to pay $25 for a full NICS-system FBI background check, and so with the grandfatherly-type. They'll each have to file the paperwork to transfer ownership of that old rifle.  There.  That ought to fix things! No more terrorist mass shootings!

Another E.O. will be to make it unlawful for those on the "No-Fly List" to buy guns. Now, my friends, no one seems to know how you get on the this No-Fly List, and no one seems to know how to get off this dreaded list once you get placed upon it. It seems that if some Democrat-appointee in a black robe somewhere decides that you are a terror risk, you get added to the list.  And the latest number we've heard is some 700,000 people in our country are on this list.  Do we really have that many terrorists in our midst? Me thinks not.  But while we're trying to watch football, Barry will tie one to the other and make it impossible for those on the list to buy guns. Of course, the Republican majority in Congress will scream bloody murder and the NRA will immediate file sue to stop this illegal, unconstitutional encroachment on our Rights. But then Barry will have something else to bitch about and something else to blame for his personal failures.

Did you know that Senator Teddy "The Driver" Kennedy was once on this infamous list?  No?  How about Steve Hayes, Head Editorial writer for the National Review magazine? Yep, he was placed on the list until he squealed and somehow got miraculously removed.  Maybe it had something to do with the fact that Hayes is a conservative and proud of it.  Who knows?  I think I do.

On second thought, maybe Teddy really deserved to be on this list after all.  And for all we know he's still on it, six years after his death.

So, my friends, Barry, who's told us that ISIS is the J.V. Team, and that he has them contained, and that everything is just fine...isn't.  And now, he'll tell us that he's finally figured out how to solve this problem...that, up until today, wasn't really a problem.  

Is you head hurting?  Mine is...

The "Publish" button is being pushed at exactly 2:00 p.m., Pacific Daylight Time, exactly 3 hours before Barry throws up all over our TV sets.  Sit down, fasten your safety belts and hang on...

Saturday, December 5, 2015

Closing GITMO: Obama's Preachments vs. the Truth...

Our Community Organizer POTUS is extremely fond of lecturing us on virtually everything, but especially on why it would be a very good idea to close GITMO.  And for those who've been living in a dumpster behind the local Wal-Mart, GITMO stands for the Guantanamo Naval Base, Cuba. But to commie pinko dumbass liberal weenies, GITMO stands for "Chimpy McBushhitler's Guantanamo Prison where really nice Muslim folks who have done not a thing at all to us are kept for years against their will." 

Obama tells us that we can't keep it open because it "costs too much."  Whoa!  Is this the very first time in American history when a Democrat worried about what something cost?  This, the guy who's spent more than $40 Million of our hard-earned tax money on teeny little vacations to Hawaii and Martha's Vineyard?  Costs too much?  Really!

He also tells us whenever he thinks we might be listening that GITMO also offers up a strong inducement for would-be terrorists across our fruited plain to join the cause and start beheading mommies and daddies everywhere.  Hmmm...

Well children, let me, The Chuckmeister, provide you with the truth on each of these two issues.  I can.  POTUS won't. So what else is new?  Here goes:

GITMO sits on the far easternmost tip of Cuba, some 400 miles south of Miami.  We won it as a consequence of the Spanish-American War in 1903.  You'll recall Teddy Roosevelt and his Rough Riders charging up San Juan Hill? No?  I guess we really don't teach history in our schools any more.  

Anyway, we took it as the spoils of war and put a nice neat Naval base upon its 45 square miles.  It is our oldest overseas Naval base.  It hosts nearly 9,500 Navy and Army personnel, and hundreds more Department of the Navy Civilians and other civilian contractors.  It also employs more than 6,000 Cubans who show up every morning to clean toilets and sweep the floors on the more than 650 buildings located there.  I guess the Castros enjoy collecting all that filthy lucre from us capitalists via the sweat of the brow of their poor countrymen.  They're just a bit "more equal," don't you know.

Oh yeah, it also features a nice, clean, neat jail.  But it offers much more than a jail. More on that later.

Like other military installations GITMO offers many conveniences to those stationed there.  It has a bowling alley, an outdoor movie theater and several chain fast food joints, including a Burger King, a KFC, a Subway, a McDonalds, a Dairy Queen and a Baskin-Robbins.  In short, GITMO is an important forward operating base we need to monitor activities throughout the Caribbean Sea.  It was essential during Dubya Dubya Deux to keep track of enemy subs, and still is.

Oh yeah, that jail thing.  All of a sudden 9/11 happened.  The Muslim terrorist jihadist murdering thugs flew a couple of hijacked commercial jets into our Twin Towers and killed 3,000 of our people.  We started collecting bad guys on the battlefields of the Middle East.  We needed someplace to put them that wasn't on U.S. soil.  Were they to set foot here, my friends, they would automatically earn the rights and privileges of our Constitution...the same Constitution they abhor.  That same "wet foot, dry foot" thing that the Cubans are endowed with when they set sail on rickety little boats and try to make their way to Miami.  They would get the Bill of Rights to beat us up with. 

So our guys put a nice, new, shiny jail on GITMO.  One, it appears, that's equipped with prayer rugs, arrows pointing toward Mecca so they can pray to their little jihist hearts' content, halal grub, not a pig in sight and plenty of lawyers and interpreters and soccer fields and Korans so they can stay entertained.  All-in-all, I'd say it's a major improvement over wherever they came from.  Except, our liberal minions are shocked that we would actually consider them terrorists and prisoners instead of simply lawbreakers. They want these goat-lovers accorded Constitutional privileges and given trials in downtown Manhattan.  I'm not a big fan of Islamic terrorists.  I'm also not a big fan of commie liberal fools.

Back to GITMO.

So we build this prison.  In 2002.  A full year after 9/11.  So tell me, liberal weenies, how did a prison in GITMO built a full year after 9/11, provide the impetus for 9/11?  It didn't.  Case closed.

And now to the cost of our nice, shiny, clean jail on GITMO. Our Golfer-in-Chief tells us that each of the prisoners on GITMO costs us more than $One Million Dollars a year to maintain.  He arrives at this figure by simply dividing the total amount it costs to run GITMO - the entire Naval base - by the number of prisoners we keep behind bars there.  So, the more prisoners, the less cost per prisoner. And the fewer the number of prisoners, the more they each cost!  So, the more prisoners Barry ships out on a Friday evening, under cover of darkness, while nobody's looking, after the evening papers have hit the newsstands, to some toilet of a Middle Eastern country, the more each remaining GITMO prisoner costs us!  You see how that works?

Let's net this out:  It costs just over $600,000,000 (Six Hundred Million) a year to operate GITMO.  Time was we had more than 700 murdering thugs at GITMO, including the guy who planned 9/11 and Bin Ladin's driver.  Using Barry's accounting, that would have meant just under a Mil apiece. We're down to just over 100 prisoners. Does that mean it costs $6 Million a Year for each to keep imprisoned? To Barry, it does.  To the people who watch MSPMS, it does. To the nincompoops who read the NY Slimes, it does.

Imagine when he gets us down to one miserable lying murdering jihadist killer; that means that blemish on the butt of humanity will cost us Six Hundred Million Dollars! Will that be costly enough for the Lap Dog Media to demand that GITMO be closed? Me thinks it will...

So, my friends, and you are my friends, stop watching MSPMS and reading the NY Slimes and start researching THE TRUTH for a change, and learn what's actually happening.  Don't believe the bile that spewing from the sniveling lips of the liberal Lap Dog Media.  They'll mislead you just like they've misled so many once-loyal Americans.  

There.  That should do it!  Now on to some other Earth-shattering problem to solve...

Friday, November 20, 2015

POTUS' G-20 Summit Press Conference...For Dummies.

In case you were fortunate enough to miss B. Hussein Obama's press conference at the G-20 Summit in Turkey on November 16th, I've decided to do you a major favor and provide a summary for your reading (dis)pleasure. I mean, you need to know what's going on, Pilgrim, and I'm just the guy to tell you.  And so, without further ado, here's the World According to Barry:  

"Good mornin' ev-bodi!"  

Remember that climate change is the greatest calamity we face, nothing is more important, so let's do everything we can to confront it...And, uhhh...Thanks to our hosts here in Turkey. They're doing a great job, as always...And, uhhhh...Oh, Yeah, that thing that happened a few days ago in Paris was really a setback...And, uhhhhh...Like I've said many times before, my strategy to contain ISIS is working...And, uhhhhhh...And, uhhhhhhh...My State Department, my military, my generals, my advisers...And, uhhhhhhhh...My economy, my Secretary of State, my, my, my, my, my...And, uhhhhhhhhhh...Me, me, me, me, mine, mine, mine, I, I, I...Did I mention that my strategy to contain ISIS is working?...Just because the people who committed the "setback" we experienced in Paris were Muslims, that doesn't mean that all Muslims are bad people...And, uhhhhhhhhhhhh...We must accept the refugees from Syria, despite the fact that I failed to cross that "Red Line" and let the Syrians be barrel bombed a few years back, and yeah, it's tough, but that's the kind of people Americans are...And, uhhhhhhhhhhhh...My ISIS containment strategy is working, and don't ask me anymore about it!...And, uhhhhhhhhhhhh... Republicans are afraid of the media and widows and 3 year-old orphans...And, uhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh...I don't care about winning. I don't care about America winning.  I don't have time for that..And, uhhhhhhhhhhhhhh uuuhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh..."

"Thanks, ev-bodi."

And so, you've now been briefed on how a 45 minute press conference, in front of an increasingly hostile Lap Dog Media, which is amazing in its own right, unfolded in Turkey. If you missed it, congratulate yourself...

Don't thank me.  That's why God put me here.

Chuckmeister, out!

Friday, November 13, 2015

The Very Biggest "Gun Free Zone" Thus Far...

There are 158 dead as this is written.  158 dead in the City of Lights, Paris, France. Six different locations, including a theater, a cafe and a soccer stadium.  An unknown number of murdering Islamic Fascist Jihadist killers attacked innocent theater goers, soccer fans and just plain folks out for a night on the town.  They used AK-47's, grenades and suicide vests to kill as many as possible, as they shouted "Aluhu Akhbar," or "God is Great."  The Religion of Peace has struck again.

Notice that this did not occur in Dallas, or Miami, or Oklahoma City, or Wichita, or Nashville.  All of these cities in which there would have been a significant number of concealed carriers, guns at the ready, to smoke these damned bastards before they could have taken nearly as many as they did.  Just as soon as these animals had started, their miserable lives would have been snuffed out by someone, anyone with a concealed weapon.  And their numbers are now legion.  One in twenty in Florida, for example, have a concealed carry permit.  And, as my famous quote will attest, if only 5% of the ducks were armed, do you think anyone would go duck hunting?

But Europe has been disarmed.  France, Germany, Spain, Luxembourg, England.  All disarmed.  They've had their figurative pockets picked of the means to protect themselves. In France, as an example, it is illegal for a private citizen to own a handgun or a military style weapon.  Just as Barry and his Sycophants are trying to do to America, the good people of Europe have had their guns taken from them. And they've thus been relegated to a bunch of "sheeple." They are completely defenseless.  And those who are attempting to do this to us should be ashamed.  If they had any shame, that is.

What is there about our leaders that makes them want to take away our ability to defend ourselves, or the Lefties they lead acquiescent with being rendered completely defenseless?

I'm pissed, my friends!  This is completely unacceptable! Paris, perhaps the most beautiful city on Earth, is nothing but a "target rich environment."  Jihadist Muslims just took their time, slaughtering innocents, one at a time, reloading again and again, over a period of at least two hours.  We don't know how many of them there were...or are.  But we do know that our open societies are ripe pickings for them.  They can strike anytime, and anywhere. And we are defenseless.  And that sucks, my friends.  But I can tell you this:  Those states, and cities, where adults are in charge, won't permit this to happen. Those states and cities where they can read English, and thus understand the 27 little words in the 2nd Amendment, won't permit this to happen.  Those states and cities, where they value human life and believe that people should have the means to protect themselves, won't permit this to happen.  In other locations, good Americans will be nothing but targets. And that sucks, my friends.

Paris, France, was a war zone tonight.  And Paris is on lock down for the first time since the end of World War Two. The Eiffel Tower is dark, for the first time since 1944. And we still don't know how many of them there were, or where they are, or if we got them all.  But we do know this:

Paris is the very biggest "Gun Free Zone" thus far.  But I fear it won't be the biggest for long.  And I ask, what are we finally going to do about it?  As a U. S. Congressman friend of mine recently opined, when asked how he would prepare for the coming conflagration, "Start stockpiling canned goods and ammunition," he said.  "You'll soon need them both."

Sunday, November 1, 2015

I'd Rather be Waterboarded...

I'd rather be waterboarded than ever set foot on another commercial airliner.  Why? Glad you asked.  Here's why...

When I first started flying on business back in the mid-70's, life was good.  The planes were new, clean and neat.  They usually took off half empty, were occupied by guys, mainly, in suits and ties, and the stewardesses (acceptable terminology back in that non-politically correct era) were young, slim, fit and gorgeous.  In fact, I formed some friendships with stews, ahem, owing to the fact that I often flew the same airlines on the same routes they flew.  I worked so much, and so often, that forming, and nurturing, such relationships was about the only hobby I had time for.    

I had a secondary one, though.  I actually kept a little book in my inside left breast pocket.  In it I'd record the name of the first time I arrived at each new city and each new airport.  At one point I'd flown into 177 different cities and more than 200 separate airports.  Ever heard of White River Junction, Vermont?  I've been there.  At one point I had flown into San Francisco an eye-popping 123 times!

Oh, the ticket prices were outrageous, but most of us were flying on business, and thus on expense accounts, so we didn't care.  I was outfitted with an Airline Travel Card, enabling me to charge my flights directly to my company. And my flight charges back then averaged more than $6,000 a month!  Round trip between LAX and NYC was $405.00. Not so much now, but back then, you could buy a nice new car for about $7,000, so 405 bucks was a princely sum. Enough that it kept Gypsies and backpackers and smelly guys with chickens on their laps on their way to Nicaragua from being in the seat next to you.  In short, flying was enjoyable. I recall those of us who were frequent fliers used to brag to our friends and neighbors about where we'd been and what we'd done and how much fun we were having.  And they were all jealous.  

No longer.

The Federal Government decided to get involved and deregulate the airlines. Remember when they broke up Bell Telephone?  No?  Then you need to Google it and learn. They decoupled Bell Telephone from its regional Bells in an effort to keep the Big Boy from screwing us Little People. However, now, more than 30 years later, they've re-connected themselves into regional Bells and prices have gone up!  It seems whenever the Feds get involved in something - anything - they screw it up. Remember that when they tell you that bacon is bad for you.  

Back to the airlines.  They unshackled ticket prices from Federal control, which enabled the bigger airlines to gobble up the smaller ones. From more than 50 major airlines at one time, we're now down to 4.  Remember Eastern Airlines? Northwest Airlines? Pacific Southwest Airlines?  Midwest Airlines?  They existed, and I flew them.  

And whereas the planes back then took off half-full, now there's not a plane that leaves the ground without an ass in every single seat. And some of those asses belong to people weighing 400 pounds.  One on each side of you.  The planes are likely old, dirty, smelly and cramped.  And the Flight Attendants (political correctness will kill us all!) are quite possibly the same ones who were tending to my flights 40 years ago. Old, decrepit, stooped over, underpaid and crabby.  And the bathrooms?  Don't ask. There's probably the next cure for Ebola growing in there.  

Why the big change?  Deregulation has resulted in super low fares.  It costs even less to fly coast-to-coast now than it did then.  And this has opened up the (non)friendly skies to virtually everyone.  And that has ruined it for people like me who harbor fond memories of the good old days.  Too bad. So sad.  

Now then, all was not sweetness and light for moi.  I happen to be infected with that particular form in insanity known as "acrophobia."  Now acrophobia means I'm scared of heights. Not a little scared.  A lot scared.  In fact, I wish I wasn't quite so tall.  And if 6 feet makes me queasy, think of how 36,000 feet affects me.  I never wanted to fly an average of one plane a day for several years.  That's right, kiddies, I averaged a plane a day, seven-days-a-week, for more than four years.  That works out to more than 3,000,000 miles, in this, an age just before they started awarding frequent flyer mileage points.  Just my luck.

I was so scared of flying that I made it a point to study each and every aspect of flying until I had convinced myself that it was enough, at least, to risk my butt each and every day.  I actually took flying lessons in an effort to beat my phobia.  At one time I knew how many rivets there are in a 727, and a 707, and a DC-8, and a 747, etc. I could tell you how far the wings could flex up and down before they broke off. I mean, we're talking about silver tubes hurtling through the sky at 530 miles an hour, filled with a couple hundred kindred souls, piloted by some nameless, faceless dude way up front, who you've never met, and never will meet, who could well be a serial killer. What's not to like?

Now, I didn't actually fly every day.  I averaged flying a bit over five days a week.  But on the days I flew, I would frequently change planes at least once, and sometimes two or three times.  On one particular day way back when, I started at 5:30 a.m. in Columbus, OH, flew on to Cincinnati, then to Chicago, and on to Sudbury, Ontario, Canada. There, I worked an eight-hour day in a hospital, lecturing internal medicine physicians on combination antimicrobial therapy. Don't ask.  

At about 5:00 p.m., I headed for the airport, flew to Chicago again, then on to Louisville, KY, and from there on to Lexington, through a thunderstorm, just in time to rack out and prep for an early morning business meeting the next day. Not fun, my friends. Six separate flight numbers in just a bit more than 19 hours. Did I mention how much fun I was having?  At the time I thought I was.  Funny how you manage to ignore the very worst aspects of whatever you have to do until you don't have to do it anymore.  I imagine that's how lion tamers must feel.

Anyway, there are some pretty good carriers now. Southwest is a peach.  And Jet Blue.  I was on the very first JB A-320 that left Long Beach on its way to New York. This airline was re-imagined based on the failings of all the other carriers. Big, comfortable leather seats.  A video screen for every chair.  DirecTV.  On-time departures and arrivals.  Free snacks.  Cheap drinks.  Great airline!  But it still has to fly hub-and-spoke, just like every other carrier, so it's at the mercy of foul weather, clogged airports and all the other crappy airlines.  But United?  Blechhh!  American? Double blechhhh!  I don't like any of them.  Most of them suck!

And a bit more on airports.  You have to leave for the average airport hours before flight time to park your car (arm and a leg to do so), scramble to the concourse, fight your way through a long line to the Transportation Security Agent dummies who will gladly feel you up to make sure you aren't carrying a nuclear weapon.  These TSA-types used to work for companies like Wackenhut.  I actually was a security guard for that outfit when I was going to college.  I guarded a Banquet Foods processing plant in Marshall, MO.  Why they hired security guards, I don't know.  Who would want to steal some frozen chicken dinners?  Minimum wage all the way. No talent.  No smarts. Just an entry-level job that used to have entry-level people in it.  

Back to airport security agents of yore.  These dweebs were there to check baggage for obvious signs of evil intent. Nothing more.  We're talking $12.00 an hour, and those on the receiving end of that ignominious sum were probably overpaid.  

But then 9/11 happened.  The Democrats, never letting a crisis go to waste (thank you Rahm Emmanuel), they demanded that these min-wage bozos be folded into the new Homeland Security Department.  So they were bumped up in pay to $25.00 an hour, starting, and forced to join the union. And you know who union members vote for? That's right, my friends, Democrats.  In one fell swoop the Dems magically created a whole new voting bloc, and another bunch of dummies to do their bidding.  But these same room temperature-I.Q. TSA agents went from looking for knives and guns to looking for more than 4 ounces of breast milk, or pin knives, or fingernail clippers.  Oh, and they routinely cop feels of little girls, old ladies and, if they're of the (im)proper persuasion, nice looking guys, or girls.  Sick.

My personal belief is that if you're planning to fly less than 300 miles, say, LAX to Las Vegas, you're far better off to drive than to fly.  Figure an hour an a half before flight time to arrive and park and make your way through security to get to the plane, plus drive-time to get to the airport, plus a hour's flight time, and then another hour at the destination city to get off, retrieve your bags and make it to a cab or rent a car, plus drive-time to your destination.  We're talking five or six hours if you fly, versus  four hours if you drive.  And that doesn't factor in delays due to weather or tie-ups at your destination. And if you drive, you can always stop, grab a sandwich, take in the sights, take a pee, and enjoy the leisurely trip. And driving is much, much cheaper.  All-in-all, this is a no-brainer decision.

And so, my friends, and you are my friends, this has been my little brain-dump on how it was to fly in those wonderful days of yore, when the planes were empty, the stews were gorgeous, the bathrooms were clean, the ticket prices were sky-high (pun intended) and flying actually was peaceful, relaxing and enjoyable.  

Now?  I'd rather be waterboarded...

Friday, October 23, 2015

Not To Make This Little Underrated Blog all About Guns, But...

Not to make this little blog all about guns, but while I'm at it, I just couldn't resist reporting to you, my loyal readership, which numbers in the many tens, about some recently garnered quotes from politicians and celebrities about gun control.

Yes, these otherwise nice folks, no doubt, seem to believe that, even though they don't know squat about guns, they have the soapbox from which to opine.  Like our (Non)Fearless Leader, who seems to think that "modest gun control measures" equates to full-blown, knocking-on-your-door-in-the-middle-of-the-night, black helicopter, hand-over- the-guns confiscation goons, these bozos are so scared of guns they want to take yours away and leave you defenseless.  Don't know how they think it would benefit them by disarming us, and we have to assume that they don't do much of anything without benefiting.  And I don't know why they think anyone would care what they think about guns, or anything else for that matter, but they have a tendency to open their mouths and start spewing blather.  And there's always some low-rent reporter to memorialize that blather for the rest of us to read. And here, my loyal friends, are some of the dumbest things they felt obligated to share with us, and I feel obligated to share with you. Ready?  Okay, here we go...

-  Rep. Louise Slaughter, D-NY, was on Current TV's "Viewpoint" recently.  Yes, Current TV, the station nobody ever watches.  She blamed the Second Amendment for making us "unsafe anywhere," and said "gun control has to be done."  Her classic comment was, "The 2nd Amendment protects the people who want all the guns they can have. The rest of us, we've got no 2nd Amendment.  What are we supposed to do?"  Ummm, yes, Louise.  What, indeed?

-  Comedian, some say, Jay Mohr tweeted the following comment shortly after the Boston Marathon terrorist bombing, claiming that the 2nd Amendment somehow inspired the two Muslim jihadist brothers from central Asia to plant pressure cooker bombs that killed three and injured 264. Apparently, according to Mohr, Islamic fundamentalism had nothing to do with it (!).  And, according to Mohr, global violence will stop if America would just rescind the 2nd Amendment (!).  His official comment: "What bothers me most about today is that we're getting used to it. Enough! 2nd Amendment must go.  Violence has to stop. Culture MUST change." Get back on your meds, Jay. Do it. Do it now...

-  Here's one of my personal favorites.  Colorado State Sen. Jessie Ulibarri (D-Adams County), an anti-gun zealot, believes that guns are unnecessary and should be eliminated.  He shared with us his opinion on the January 8, 2011 shooting of Rep. Gabby Giffords in Tucson, AZ. Giffords managed to escape being killed by Jared Loughner that day, because people in the crowd took him down by hitting him over the head with a chair and wrestling him to the ground.  But Ulibarri believes otherwise.  His priceless comment:  "Congressman Giffords' life was saved and so many others when very valiant folks stood up to defend themselves and protect themselves, and they did it with ballpoint pens."  Ballpoint pens?  Really?  Should we do "Universal Background Checks" on people before they're allowed to shop at Office Depot?

-  V.P. Joe Biden is famous for an almost endless number of gaffes that come tumbling from his aging mouth on an almost daily basis.  But one of his most (in)famous quotes had to do with his heartfelt belief that we don't really need "assault weapons," whatever they are.  He believes a shotgun will do just fine.  His quote:  "Well, you know, my shotgun will do better for you than your AR-15, because you want to keep someone away from your house, just fire the shotgun through the door."  Let's start with the fact that that's illegal, Joe. And it surely didn't do so well for Oscar Pistorius' girlfriend.  Oh, never mind...

-  Actor Danny Glover is almost as famous for his racist pronouncements as he is for his acting persistence, if not prowess.  Given the fact that he's not only a socialist, but he's black, I've accorded him two quotes for your reading pleasure, although I'm sure there are many more.  One of his most famous quotes came during a speech he gave at Texas A and M University recently.  He told students that day that the "Right" created the 2nd Amendment for no other reason than to enslave black people and kill Native Americans. Here's his comment: "The Second Amendment comes from the Right to protect themselves from slave revolts, and from uprising by Native Americans.  A revolt from people who were stolen from their land or revolt from people whose land was stolen from, that's what the genesis of the Second Amendment is."   If that were true, wouldn't you think there would be a prohibition against gun ownership by blacks or Native Americans?  Wouldn't you?

You know this guy primarily from his "Lethal Weapon" movies.  In those iconic films he was usually brandishing guns and taking out bad guys.  But you'll likely be stunned when you read another of his recent quotes.  He said:  "I don't own a gun and definitely not only gun control, we should abolish guns, the personal guns. That's how far I'm willing to go."   That's sad, because I was hoping he'd be willing to go much, much farther.  And soon.  By the way, Dan Dan, never end a sentence with a preposition...

-  Senator (Lady Di) Dianne Feinstein (D-CA), has been for gun control since before almost anyone else.  In fact, she's personally responsible for the original 1993 "assault weapons" ban that ended with a thud when it was proven assault weapons, whatever they are, aren't responsible for assaults.  In case you're unaware, less than 3% of all gun deaths are caused by rifles, whether black and scary-looking, or the wholesome deer rifle-type.  Lady Di, owing to her senior status here in CA, she gets two quotes. The first comes from a speech during a Senate Judiciary Committee hearing. She said, "If I could have banned them all - "Mr. and Mrs. America, turn in your guns", - I would have." Obviously her aim.  Of interest, this lady (ahem!) has a concealed weapons carry permit, and has since her BFF Harvey Milk was assassinated while standing next to her on the steps of San Fran's Court House a couple of decades back. Later she said, "We have federal regulations and state laws that prohibit hunting ducks with more than three rounds. And yet it's legal to hunt humans with 15-round, 30-round, even 150-round magazines."  Legal to hunt humans?  I didn't know that. 150 round magazines? Never seen one, and I've been around guns my entire life. I think I'll gun-up and head toward Sacramento to legally off a few of those otherwise unemployable lawmaker bozos who have turned California into a socialist utopia...

-  Speaking of senators, there's one Charles Schumer, D-NY, Ranking Member, Democrat Party, Senate of the United States.  You probably know of this guy.  He's a major-league loud mouth and gun-grabber of the First Magnitude.  He's famous for many dumbass quotes about how he'd like to take your guns, but one jumped out at me that I thought you'd enjoy reading.  Chuckie said:  "All we ask is registration for guns, just like we have for our cars."  Ummm, Chuck my man, buying and driving cars is a privilege, not a fundamental, inalienable Right...

-  Another Colorado dumbass is Rep. Diana DeGette (D-CO). She made a comment during an April gun control forum in Denver confirming what gun owners already suspected.  She doesn't know what she's taking about.  She's dead-set on banning high-capacity magazines.  And with that goal in mind, she said, "If you ban them in the future, the number of these high-capacity magazines is going to decrease dramatically over time because the bullets will have been shot and there won't be any more available." Whaaaaaaatttt?  When you shoot all the bullets the magazines are no longer usable?  Maybe she can't figure out how to reload them, but every one else in the entire world, can.  I'm sorry to ruin your day, folks, but these people actually make our laws. 

-  Remember Marion Barry, the D.C. Mayor who was caught on camera smoking crack cocaine and taking a bag full of cash from a guy purchasing a favor or two?  Well, he uttered a somewhat infamous quote about guns that you'll find amusing.  "Outside of the killings," he said, "Washington has one of the lowest crime rates in the nation."  Outside of the killings, of course.

-  Tony Bennett knows how to sing.  But apparently that's all he knows.  He offered up his opinions on the Second Amendment at a February press conference in Washington, D.C.  He seems to believe that the 2nd Amendment puts the United States at risk of becoming a reincarnated Nazi Germany and being invaded by the "rest of the world."  His comment for all to see:  "It's the kind of turn that happened to the great country of Germany, when Nazis came over and created tragic things, and they had to be told off. And if we continue this kind of violence and accept it in our country, the rest of the world's going to really take care of us, in a very bad way."  Go ahead.  Re-read that quote a couple of times.  It won't help, but go ahead...

-  Now this brings us to actor Liam Neeson, who almost always appears in a movie with a gun in his hand.  Yet, it appears good (bad?) ol' Liam is an anti-gun zealot.  Here's what he had to say about America and our love of guns:  "It is the right to bear arms which is the problem.  I think if the Founding Fathers knew what was happening they'd be turning in their graves."  Thanks for sharing, Lame.  I encourage all of my loyal readers to Google "Founding Fathers - Gun Ownership."  You'll find literally dozens of articles memorializing hundreds of pro-gun ownership and use quotations from the people who risked their all to create our country, and they needed their guns to do it.  Go ahead. I'll wait...

-  Jim Carrey threw up on himself a couple of years back when he decided to school us on guns.  He said:  "Anyone who would run out to buy an assault rifle after the Newtown massacre has very little left in their body or would be worth protecting."  Jimmie, you DO know an assault rifle wasn't used at Newtown, right? No?  

-  Everybody's favorite celebrity funny woman Rosie O'Donnell isn't too big on Democracy.  She recently offered her opinion on guns and what we should do with them:  

"I don't care if you want to hunt.  I don't care if you think it's your right. You are not allowed to own a gun, and if you do own a gun I think you should go to prison."  Now there is a celeb who doesn't sugar-coat her contempt for the Constitution and for our individual, God-given rights.  Oh yeah, I forgot to mention.  She has armed bodyguards. And if she thinks guns cause crime, I'd like to offer a thought: "Spoons made Rosie fat."

-  Now you would think that Sly Stallone would be a big fan of guns, given that he's made tens of millions of bucks with one or more in his hands.  Remember Rambo III? Sly with a .30 caliber machine gun in his mucho toned hands mowing down those bad Viet Congers?  But no, America!  He's a big gun-grabber!  Read on: "Until America, door to door, takes every handgun, this is what you're gonna' have.  It's pathetic. It really is pathetic. We're living in the Dark Ages."  Makes you want to run right out and fork over $15 to see one of his blow-em-up movies, right?

-  Now Sean Connery must surely be a gun-rights supporter, yes?  I mean, he's still spending all the money he made off playing James Bond, with a Walther PPK in his cigarette-stained paws.  Wrongo, oh burnt powder breath!  His quote: "It is said that a total ban on handguns would take away innocent pleasure from thousands of people.  Is that more or less pleasure than watching your child grow up?"  I would ask Sean if having a handgun might make it more or less likely that your child could grow up in this violent society where every bad guy has a gun.  Do you think, Sean, that the nice people in the south side of Chicago would like to have a gun right about now?  And ask yourself, why is owning a gun in Chicago absolutely verboten when there's an average of 50 shootings and 10 deaths on an average weekend?

-  Then there's Matt Damon.  Made a bunch of cash off the Bourne movies where he shot hundreds of guys using one or another handgun, he did.  He said:  "I actually hate guns. They freak me out.  If you were ever in a situation in which you had a gun, that means you were in a situation where you wanted to kill someone."  Is there something in the Hollywood water?  Maybe they're getting prescribed some really strange meds from all those Beverly Hills doctors.  Don't know. Don't want to find out. But if you were a bad guy hoping to scoop up some goodies from a Hollywierd celeb's house, are you more or less likely now to choose Mattie's house to ply your trade?

And lest we think that all of these quotes were from somewhere in the distant past, I bring to you a quote from our resident Queen, Ms. Hillary Clinton.  In a town hall meeting just this past week she was asked if she was willing to undertake the Australian form of gun control.  That, you may recall, involved increasing taxes on all the citizens in order to generate enough money to forcibly buy back every single gun in the entire country.  640,381 guns were forcibly confiscated from the Australian people. Her cryptic answer to that question was, "It's certainly worth considering." Apparently Hil(liar)y isn't too fond of the 2nd Amendment, which would preclude such an exercise.  And maybe she's no fan of the 1st, the 4th, the 5th and the 10th, as well. Or, perhaps she's energized by her soon-to-be predecessor Barry, the Golfer-in-Chief's, use of executive orders. However, I would suggest to Ms. Clinton that there are 100 million Americans who own more than 300,000,000 guns, who might take issue with such a plan.  It sure could be entertaining to watch, though, right? Oh, and what's that sound I hear?  It's the sound of another one million people joining the National Rifle Association, having finally, finally, come to believe that the radical Left is dead-set on forcibly confiscating their guns.  We've known it for years.  now we have proof.

-  And speaking of the Community Organizer-in-Chief, he's produced some memorable comments about his anti-gun feelings.  One of the best, in my opinion, was back in 2007, when he was debating guns with one Mr. John Lott, famous attorney and fellow University of Chicago professor.  Actually, Mr. Lott was a professor.  Mr. Obama was a part-time lecturer, regardless of what he, and his sycophants, have told you.  His comment?  Ready?  Here goes:  "I don't believe people should be able to own guns."  Short and sweet, he was.  Put into perspective, it kinda' let's you know where Barry's heart - and head - is as regards this issue.

So, Mr. and Mrs. America, these are the utterances of the folks who mold our culture and make our laws.  The folks who are either sworn to uphold the Constitution and the Bill of Rights, all of them, not just those that tickle their fancies at the moment, or are the folks we make multi-zillionaires by listening to or viewing their handy work.  And they are uniformly dumber than a bag full of rocks. Remember that the next time they try and talk you into something...

Thursday, October 8, 2015

When Will They Ever Learn?

Those of us of a certain age will recall the lyrics to Peter, Paul and Mary's song, "Where Have All The Flowers Gone? And they'll also remember the refrain in that iconic song which asked, "When will they ever learn?"

Now, folks familiar with that song will note that the question in that refrain was intended to be rhetorical.  In fact, it was repeated twice, just to make the point that we all knew the answer; we will never learn.  

And so it is with Liberals in our country as regards gun-control and their all-consuming desire to make every single school, college and university in America a "gun free zone," and every single resident of the once-mighty America a prospective victim.

This past week saw another in what seems to be an unending spate of mass murders on a school campus.  A deranged killer brought several guns to a school, killed nine and wounded nine others.  What makes the story so very, very sad, besides the obvious loss of precious, irreplaceable young life, is that these killings were completely unnecessary. And that's because this school, Umpqua Community College in Roseberg, Oregon, is a "gun free zone."  And, my friends, and you are my friends, every single mass shooting in an American school over the past 20 years has been in a "gun free zone." 

The FBI states that a "mass shooting" is defined as one in which four or more people die.  Using that measure, and this Agency's statics, there have been 153 mass shootings in America during the period 2000 - 2015.  (Note to the perennially uninformed or misinformed:  Don't believe the liberal loons who will try and convince you there is a mass murder every hour on the hour.)  And every single one occurred in a "gun free zone." Whether at a shopping mall, a park, a hospital, a military base, an office building or a school, gun-hating Liberals have decided that the way to stop mass shootings is to hang up a sign saying, "Gun Free Zone."  And I ask in response, "When Will They Ever Learn" it does not work?

Ask yourself, if you were a prospective mugger, rapist, thief or killer, would you be deterred, or would you be encouraged by a sign that, in effect, states:  "Target Rich Environment?" For that, my friends, is exactly what a "gun free zone" is.  A place where the to-be-criminal knows that he's almost certain not to encounter any defensive measures.  None.  Nobody to stop his murderous rampage.  Nobody to keep him from going out in a blaze of glory.  Nobody to rob him of the front page headlines he so desperately wants, that he's sure to get, and a place in infamy forever.  

However, the Loony Left is so "non compos mentis" (look it up) that they actually believe that if they just add one more anti-gun law to the 22,500 already on America's books, the criminals among us will finally, finally begin to stop shooting innocent folks. Yeah, right.  Remember, a criminal is someone who does not obey the law!  And no amount of laws will cause a criminal to start.  What about that is so difficult to understand?  

Picture this:  The shooter at Virginia Tech a few years back is walking toward the campus preparing to murder 31 and wound another 40.  But he sees the sign that says, "Gun Free Zone" which by the way was standing there, all bright and shiny, and says, "Oh no!  I can't take my guns in there! I guess I'll go on home, smoke a doobie, eat some Fritos, watch a few Jerry Springer reruns and knock back a Bud Light or two . Does anyone anywhere actually believe this?

Gun-hating, gun-grabbing Liberals do.

Barry Obama does.

"Sheriff" Joe Biden does.

Hil(liar)y Clinton does.

Little Mikey Bloomberg does.

Really, REALLY Big Mikey Moore does.

And many, many others believe it as well, often those who are surrounded by armed security to protect them from the nut jobs who might be inclined to make their mark by taking them out.  

I've been asking myself this one question for years:  "Is Liberalism a mental illness?" 

Let me tell you how "in the tank" the Mainstream Media is on this subject.  The shooter in this tragedy was a half black/half white kid who was seriously deranged.  His mom is black, his dad, a Brit, is white.  His Facebook page reflects his mixed race pedigree.  I keep waiting for B. Hussein Obama to come out and say, "If I had a son, he'd look just like this shooter." 

Still waiting...

But the liberals' meme is that only crazed white supremacists shoot up schools.  So, in an effort to continue promoting that flawed pretense, CNN, the used-to-be, go-to source for righteous, bias-free news, airbrushed his picture in their reportage so that he appears to be lily white.  Whhaaaaatt? Yes, they did.  They really did.  Do they really think we'll be dumb enough to buy this crap?  Yes, they do.

Wake up America!  You're being brainwashed by a bunch of Madison Avenue, inside-the-Beltway, drinking the Koolade, liberal Mainstream Media true believers.

Just for the record, none of the 100+ million Americans who own more than 300 million guns shot up a school yesterday. Or the day before.  Or the day before that.  Or so for today.  But God knows, if some crazed kid steals his dad's gun and goes on a rampage, it will be front page news, 24/7, until the MSM has wrung every possible gun-hating advantage from it.

Oh, and before I close down and push "Publish," I'd like to throw this into the mix.  The only "resistance" at Umpqua Community College when the 26 year-old crazy opened fire, was an overweight, part-time security guard with a can of mace. I'm not kidding. And, the Board of Directors at this school decided last year that they had better things to do with the $40,000 a year it would have cost to field a single, full-time armed guard on this campus.  They decided they really needed to install a new hardwood floor in the gym. Something tells me that more than one of the grieving parents of the nine dead kids will file lawsuit for the gross malfeasance displayed by the lefties who run this shooting gallery.

Oregon is a "shall-issue" state.  One of the 31 that are.  That means all a citizen of Oregon in good standing needs to do is stop by their local sheriff's office, plunk down $25 and walk out with a permit to carry a concealed weapon.  So any of the 3,500 kids or 200 staff and educators at this rural school could have been armed and ready to defend life and liberty. But they couldn't.  The school wouldn't let them.  How utterly tragic.  How really stupid.  

What do you think the chances are this demonic kid would have decided to shoot up this school if he thought that one, or six, or a dozen of the people there would be carrying concealed weapons?  Even might carrying concealed weapons?  Yes, exactly zero!

There's a special place in Hell for the people who permitted this gross injustice to occur.  And something tells me that, Board decision or not, there will be no next time. If I were there, or anywhere near there, I'd be packing heat.  And I'm pretty sure the rest of the students, educators and parents of this school feel exactly the same way...

Unfortunate Update:

Shortly after pushing "Publish" on this, the latest of my blog entries, I opened my Sunday paper and learned that our Civil Servant-for-Life, Governor Jerry "Moonbeam" Brown, a man who has never collected a private-sector paycheck, elected to sign into law Senate Bill 707. This is another one of those answers in search of a question the California Legislature is so famous for passing.  This flawed piece of crap makes it illegal for CCW (Concealed Carry Weapons) permit holders to carry a gun within 1,000 feet of a school zone.  Within hours after three school shootings happened across our nation in a single day, all in "gun free zones," Brown decided that what we citizens of the once Golden, but now tarnished State, really need is a law that makes honest, vetted, capable, trained and prepared CCW permit holders into criminals if they use their legally-carried guns to stop crazed mass murderers from killing our kids in or near a school. Unbelievable! 

So now it's no longer a sign saying "Gun Free Zone," it's a sign saying, "Not Only Gun Free, But Better Yet, No Guns Withing 1,000 Feet!  So, Good Hunting, And Be Sure To Have A Nice Day!"  I'm sure the California Association of Mass Murderers will rejoice at Brown's actions.  Oh, and Brown, apparently not having enough else to do, also decided to outlaw the use of the name "Redskins" by schools in our broke-ass State.  I don't blame you if you find all of this hard to believe.  As for me, it's just another gilt-edged example of why the next time you head to the polls, please don't vote to elect a commie pinko dumbass liberal weenie as governor...

Wednesday, September 9, 2015

Their Own Personal "Gun Free Zones"

It used to be that the shortest measure of time was the period between a traffic light changing from red to green in Mid-town Manhattan and the cab driver behind you honking his horn.

Now?  It's the period of time between a mass shooting by some crazed jerk with a gun and Obama and his Sycophants (great name for a rock band, huh?) banging the gun control drum.  

Example?  A couple of weeks back a really pissed off racist gay insane black man named Vester Lee Flanagan, aka "Bryce Williams," murdered a couple of straight white innocent young reporters on live TV in Moneta, Virginia.  He was disgruntled at having been fired from WDBJTV in Roanoke, VA.  One in a succession of jobs this bozo failed at, it turns out.  He blamed not only his employer, but several of the other employees, including the two he decided to execute. Apparently he was so twisted that he took ordinary office banter between fellow employees as racist slurs.  I guess that's how it is if you're a really pissed off racist gay insane black guy.  Seems like that's happening quite a bit lately, yes?

Oh, by the way, he was admonished by his employer on a previous occasion for wearing an "Obama for President" button during an on-camera interview.  That's a no-no if you're a real reporter.  It's also a no-no if you've got any sense at all.  I guess this guy wasn't a real reporter. And I guess he was fresh out of sense.  That's why he was fired, no doubt.  It seems like there's quite a few "not real reporters" hanging around these days.  Tune to MSNBC if you want a number of examples.

So, to continue, he buys an ordinary 9mm Glock handgun, legally as it turns out, full background check and all.  In fact, he purchased this gun more than two months prior to his murderous rampage.  So let's see:  Racist gay really pissed off insane disgruntled black guy shoots two young innocent straight whites. Hate crime?  Sure. Everybody knows that. But according to Oblamo's Justice Department, no it isn't.  Or at least not yet. Being white, they were the wrong color, I guess.

I mention this because within seconds after the echo from the gun shots died out (sorry about that "died" part), Terry McCauliffe, Governor of Virginia, a job for which his only qualification was that he was the primary fund raiser for Billy Jeff "Blue Dress" Clinton, stuck his pasty face in front of a camera and called for increased gun control. "We need background checks!" he railed.  "I tried to get background checks approved but the legislature vetoed it!" he said. And our Golfer-in-Chief, Barack Hussein Obama, similarly raced to the camera and spouted another in a series of calls for increased gun control. Getting tiresome to hear for me.  You too?  

It seems to me that one of the most dangerous places in America to be is between our TelePrompTer-in-Chief and a camera.  Have you noticed that also?

Now, everyone in America who pays attention knows that we've had nationwide Federal background checks for gun purchases since 1998.  It's called the "NICS" System, for National Instant Criminal System."  You saunter on down to the local gun store, you plunks down your money for your chosen weapon, the gun store owner runs your background check and, if you pass, you're permitted to walk out with your gun. Right then and there.  Oh, unless you live in a state like Taxifornia where you can't get your gun for 10 days.  I guess the "leaders" in this state, and I use the term very loosely, assumes you're intending to take your shiny new gun and run on home to execute your wife or boy/girl/otherfriend or employer.  Of course, if you really want to "off" your significant other, you could do so with any of hundreds of lethal weapons besides a Glock 19, which this gay really pissed off disgruntled insane black killer chose to use.

The NICS check occurs for all gun purchases made in stores or gun shows or via the Internet.  And it is supposed to happen for transfers between private citizens, if they choose to follow the law. However, commie pinko weenies lie to you, the American public, by telling you there are no background checks in place. And that's why they want Congress to pass their version of new and intrusive background checks. They call them "Universal Background Checks."  Obama wants this. Hil(liar)y Clinton wants this. "Sheriff" Joe Biden want this. Chicago's Mayor Rahm Emmanuel wants this.  Tiny Mike Bloomberg, ex-Mayor of NYC and the 17th richest dude in America, wants this. He's already spent $50 million of his own money in an effort to pass ever more intrusive gun laws. Fun little hobby, right? And guys like Bloomberg tell you that 90% of our citizens want increased background checks and that everyone in the NRA wants it too. The facts: They are lying to you!

So wait.  We have background checks but they want background checks.  Hmmm. Anyone with an I.Q. above room temperature has to ask why there's a disconnect here? Well, children, here it is:  Our current system of background checks is conducted by the Feds, and is then erased, by law, within 30 days, so it would no longer be available to anyone who might want to later reference it for ownership data. That's Federal law.  The Obama Clan version would run that same check and then keep the data forever!  Why?  Good question. The only possible answer has to be that this data is necessary for the day when the Feds come knocking on your door to confiscate your guns.

Paranoid?  Perhaps.  But you're not paranoid if they're really after you.  And I think they're really after us.  

Recall just about ten exact years ago a hurricane named Katrina struck New Orleans. The police chief there chose to confiscate all firearms in the city.  Every single one! He instructed his Boys in Blue to go door to door and physically take every gun they could find.  Why?  For some reason this bozo decided he didn't want any competition or resistance from would-be muggers or robbers or looters.  What he got, in fact, was Open Season by bad guys on the poor citizens of this community who hadn't been able to vacate when the storm approached.  That would be all those who were so poor they couldn't afford a bus ticket, because their welfare checks hadn't yet arrived that month. Murders, robberies, rapes, muggings, thievery and assorted other major crimes went rampant.  And no honest citizen could mount a defense, because the Authorities had disarmed them.  Now, my fellow citizens, you have an example of what could happen if we allow the Authorities to disarm us.  And I'm not going to let that happen to me.  

So I have a solution to this seemingly unfathomable problem. And here it is: 

I've done some research on this situation and I've discovered that, with exception of the Oklahoma City bombing, almost every single mass murder since back then was committed by card-carrying, liberal, left-wing, "progressive" Democrat murderers. Examples? Sure:

  -  The Ford Hood killer, Major Nidal Hassan, was a registered Democrat and jihadist "Army of Allah" Muslim.

  -  The Virginia Tech shooter was a registered Democrat. Sent hate mail to President G. W. Bush.

  -  The Aurora, Colorado movie theater shooter, James Holmes, was a registered Democrat, Occupy supporter and volunteer for left-wing causes.

  -  The Sandy Hook Connecticut school shooter was a registered Democrat.  Hated Christians.

 -  The Columbine High School killers were not old enough to vote, but both of their families were dedicated Democrats and liberals and involved themselves in left-wing activities.

  -  Dylann Roof, the Charleston, SC shooter, was a liberal sympathizer.

  -  The black D.C. Navy Yard shooter was an Obama supporter and volunteer.  Hated conservatives and Christians.  

There are many, many other examples.  How about John Wilkes Booth?  Yes, he was a Democrat and absolutely hated our Mr. Lincoln.  Simply Google "mass shooters" and learn for yourselves if you want more.

Of late, the gun-grabbing lefties have attempted to stop mass shootings by simply putting up big signs on the entrance to public places.  They read:  "Gun Free Zones." Now that, my friends, is the very height of stupidity.  The definition of criminality is that criminals don't obey laws.  Yet, these lefties seem to think that passing a law, or putting up a sign, will cause those predisposed to law-breaking to not break laws. Let me put it a different way.  We now have more than 20,000 anti-gun laws on the books right here in Good Ol' America.  Criminals routinely break these anti-gun laws. Yet, we're incited to believe that if we put up cardboard signs instructing criminals bent on law-breaking to cease and desist, that they will cease and desist.  Isn't that the very dumbest thing you've ever heard of?  Want proof?  Okay, my brethren.  Here 'tis.  Nearly every single mass shooting to occur in the past 20 years has occurred in a "Gun Free Zone (GFZ)." Columbine was a GFZ.  Fort Hood was a GFZ.  The Navy Yard was a GFZ.  The Church in Charleston was a GFZ.  The Aurora movie theater was a GFZ.  And on, and on, and on...

So, my friends, what does this information tell us?  It tells us that lefty Democrat socialist "progressives" should be given exactly what they want:  their own personal, individual "gun free zones."  I suggest that we simply outlaw the sale of guns and ammunition to any individual who is of the commie pinko lefty dumbass weenie liberal persuasion.  Short definition? Democrats.  The result?  There will be No More Mass Murders!  The rest of us God-fearing, gun-owning 'Muricans would be left owning and keeping and bearing arms.  Thus, we would be available to assist you and our friends in the event any Bad Guys were around and about. We would even available to assist commie pinko dumbass liberal weenies (Democrats) if they're in need of assistance from real men and women like us.  Of course, they may be too damn proud to ask.  But hey, that's okay.  We'll help them anyway.  

In the meantime, let them sip their sauvignon blanc and drive their teenie little Priussesesses-sus and wait for us to come and help.  

You're welcome...