Where's Chrysler?

You know there's no more Chrysler Corp. anymore, right?

Yep, Chrysler went away back in 2004.  Mercedes-Benz bought it.  After we, the taxpayers had shoveled more than $8,000,000,000 out the door their way to help them through bankruptcy.  That's with a "B."  Its second one.

Remember Chrysler credit?  Yeah, it's now Ally Bank.  We permitted them to dump all their debts and start clean.  $8,000,000,000 in debts.  That's with a "B."  Our Government's good at that... 

Except M-B gobbled up that cash and sold Chrysler off to a hedge fund named KK&R.  That's Kolberg, Kravits and Roberts.  Which quickly renamed it the "Cerberus Corporation."  You remember that, right?  No?

And then they got tired of trying to make money with it and sold it to a "new company" named "Fiat-Chrysler."  Which has owned it for the past three years.  You knew that, right?  

No?

And they've pretty much milked everything they can out of the old designs, without ponying up the cash necessary to come up with any new ones.  Example:  The "300 series" sedans were first produced back in 2004.  They're being put out to pasture after this year.  They foisted that one design on the public for more than 20 years.  Leaving only the Jeep and the Pacifica mini-van and Ram, their truck.  Which is a Dodge, but for whatever reason they can't, or won't, call it that.  

So they're down to three basic vehicles on their showroom floor, and it's my guess they'll pull the plug within the next three years.  Why?  "Chrysler," or what they're now calling it, is an empty shell.  It's but one of 22 vehicles under the Fiat umbrella.  You read that right.  Chrysler is owned by the Italians.  And hedge funds.  And a little bit of our stock market.  So here's a partial list:

     -  Abarth     -  Alfa-Romeo     -  Chrysler    

     -  Dodge     -  Citroen     -  DSAutomobile          

     -  Fiat     -  Jeep     -  Lancia     -  Maserati     -  Opel     

     -  Peugeot     -  Ram     -  Vauxhall     -  Ferrari

You feel good about buying that new "Chrysler" product now that I've spilled the beans?  And what am I doing lifting up the hood?  Because I know nearly everything about cars, having studied them for more than 70 years.  Ask yourself:  What happened to Pontiac?  And Studebaker?  And DeSoto?  And Nash?  And Oldsmobile?  How's their warranties gonna' help you in the future when they've gone bust?  Especially since they've bet the farm on Plug-In-Electric, and it's going bust as well?  How's Chrysler's warranties gonna' help you in the future?

You could hear, "No speakadaEnglish."  (That was a lame attempt at Italian).

Now I, The Chuckmeister, don't care which car you buy.  But with the average new car sale averaging $48,034 now, and Bidenflation costing more than $750 for the average car payment, I couldn't live with myself if I didn't offer up a little advice.  Something to think about before you say "Yes" to the second largest purchase you'll ever make?

Don't buy a Chrysler product, don't buy a Plug-In Electric, and don't buy a new car.  Buy a car coming back off a 4- or 5-year lease.  Almost all new cars will make it to 150,000 miles, so a clean car with 35 - 40,000 miles is just getting started.  And you can buy it for $HALF-PRICE!

You're welcome...