Sage Advice...

I just paid a visit to my local bank.

Had to draw about a $Bunch so I could keep up with Bidenflation.  Which is playing Hell with everyone.  Except those who make so much money they don't really care.  

Anyway, I was asked by the lovely young cashier for some advice on growing old successfully.  I thought for a moment, and then coughed up a hairball.  Something from my own lips that's worthy of writing down.  Here goes:

     "You can never offer sage advice until you're old enough to have earned it.  And you never take that sage advice until you're old enough to need it."

Not bad, eh?  Well, anyway, here's the advice I offered.  Old folks like me are terrified of outliving their money.  Especially now with Bidenflation raging.  

But my advice to her, and to everyone, is to spend your heirs' money right now, while you need it.  Because you cannot qualify for all the city, county, state and Federal aid that's gleefully offered - and gobbled up by every other citizen - unless you are too broke to pay for it.  And the bozos in power always seem to think you don't need it if you've got money in the bank.  Sort of an unfair "Catch 22."  And the reason you're applying, you scream at the top of your lungs to nobody in particular, is that you don't want to run out of money!   But they don't care.  They're good little civil servants.  Go broke, they say, then give us a call.

But you can't just give your money to your kids.  If you do so over too short a period, they'll forensically track the checks back and put you in jail.  And don't try cash.  Large withdrawals can easily be tracked and its distribution imputed.  So start now taking out small sums from your bank.  Bury in under your mattress if necessary.  Then, over time, gift your kids the $Cash until your bank account is low enough that you qualify for all the juicy aid that's available.  They're trying to take your tax money and give it to somebody else.  I say claw back a chunk for yourself, right now!  

The only thing worse than winding up on a sunporch of an old age home, silver drool cup at the ready, with a 400 lb. LVN wiping your butt, is paying for all that with your own money.  I want a "last laugh."  I NEED a "last laugh."

Ya' feel me?