All-Expense Paid Trips to NYC!!!

Are you as poor as a church mouse?

Are you sick and tired of being sick and tired?

Would you like to add a little spice to your miserable plebian existence?

Ever wanted to take an all-expense paid trip to the Big Apple?  You know, New York City?  But out of your financial reach?

Okay, then, listen up fellow Patriot!  Let's say for a moment that your job is to restock Preebles and Vargles at your local Big Box Store.  And for doing that, 39 hours a week, only, so you don't qualify for healthcare, you're paid $X-teen dollars an hour.  With which you can't even fill your tank and buy yourself a Happy Meal.  And all this leaves you too poor even to buy those Preebles or those Vargles you restock everyday!  

If you're pissed off at the world, destined to always be a day late and a dollar short, lemme' recommend something to you that might prove enticing...

You've heard how the illegals are pouring across our southern border in record numbers?  And getting primo treatment from Joe O'Biden, even plane and bus and train rides to wherever they want to go?  Well, Pilgrim, how about living on the wild side?  Simply drive to the Tiajowanna border, park your car, walk across, and then add a "z" to your last name.  Ladle on the ManTan real heavy, buy yourself a sombrero, and then wade back across the Rio Mui Grande a newly-minted LatinX!!!  

Ei Carrrrramba!!!

The overworked guards will give you a cell phone and a bus ticket to wherever.  Just tell the nice border folks you'd like that "wherever" New Yawk City!  Within 3 days you'll be visiting Times Square and the Statue of Liberty!  Who knows, they may give you a ticker tape parade!  And all at Texas' Gov. Abbott's and the put-upon citizens of Texas' expense!  And you'll get sandwiches and plenty of bottled wa wa on your trip up.  Plus, you'll get to see plenty of 'Murica on your way, with lots of rest stops so you won't get too tuckered out.  And once there you can give that hypocritical, two-dimensional, under-experienced, little loudmouth ex-subway cop mayor the finger, in person.

But don't do so until you get your swag!  No, no!  Just wait 'til you hear this!  You'll first get ANOTHER cell phone upon arrival in NYC, and plenty of neat coupons to illegal-loving merchants.  And then they'll put you up in the "Row NYC Hotel," one of New Yawk's finest.  Right in the heart of Times Square, it goes out at $560.00 a night for a single, $699.00 double.  Oh yeah, and $22.00 for a two-thirds full glass of house champagne, just made in the basement.

So far NYC's Mayor Adams has contracted for 6,000 pricey hotel rooms for his new out-of-town "guests." 

Now then, you have to enter and exit the hotel through a separate exit so you don't mingle too much with the paying guests.  The ones who are paying for your rooms.  Wouldn't want to make them feel like they're getting the O'Biden Shaft.  

Oh yeah, they're getting free healthcare, too.  Why wouldn't they?

And best yet, fellow Pilgrim, Cardinal Dolan is offering free private tuition to his Catholic schools for 1,000 of these precious little illegal darlings.  The same schools NY Catholics pay through the nose for their kids to attend.  But hey, screw them!  Your kids could qualify!

Simply blow off your job at Costco, head for the border, and board that fateful bus.  You'll be in NYC for your new and mucho more wonderful life than the one you left behind here, in Taxifornia.  Where $X-dollars an hour will never, ever, ever be enough for you and your growing, now illegal, New York family...  

Think of it:  Just pretend to be somebody that a few years ago was considered an interloper, a transgressor, a trespasser, because that same illegal was, and is now considered an honored guest!  Of a corrupt, mind-numbingly inept, and hopelessly stupid President.  

But you, fellow Patriot, can make this work to your advantage.  You can wind up with a vacay and nobody will know the difference!  After all, the immigration courts are so backed up because of border-jumpers like you'll be very soon that it would be 9 years before your case comes up.  Nine Years!  And by then you'll most likely be given "Dreamer" status...  

Can you imagine what the REAL countries are saying about America?