Sniper Football!

There are 32 teams in the National Football League.

And although each of them considers literally hundreds of athletes for their starting rosters, they have to be down to 55 players each by the beginning of the regular season.

That's 1,760 players.  Total.  1,760 enormous, huge, fast, quick, mean, tough, rough, nasty, undereducated and hungry $Millionaires.  And a few tough, wiry, fast, quick and talented 185 pounders who earn $Tens of Millions. 

And although the newly-minted players make less than $1,000,000 (The 'Niners Brock Purdy's making $869,000), the seasoned regulars can make upwards of $10, $20 or even $50 $Million a season.  Star "skills" players, the Tight Ends, the Wide Receivers, the Centers, the Defensive Ends and the Quarterbacks  make the Big Money.  Which is unfair to all those mental midgets beating the crap out of each other on the line.  Unfair, I say!

And hey, why are there only 1,700 pro football players?  Since almost all of them are Black (77%), and all but 17% are "People of Color," I say the NFL should offer up greater employment opportunities to their inner-city residents.  They should get reparations!  To not do so is RACISM, right?  RIGHT?

So I'm proposing a radical new form of our now most-popular game.  In order to give an even greater number of Blacks and Browns and even Yellows to play the Game, I'm proposing we inaugurate...

                     SNIPER  FOOTBALL!!! 

And here's how it would work.  Each team would place a trained sniper with the very latest in high-powered rifles and telescopic sights at each end of the stadia.  Way up high, doncha' know.  I'm thinking behind the scoreboards.  Waaay up!

Each team would get four (4) "shots" per game.  One in each quarter.  Unless there are too many fouls, of course, and then the refs could award a few more "penalty" shots.  And trust me, the players won't want those.  

Anyway, if a particular player was proving to be dominant, then the opposing team might choose to target that player.  If the shot is on target, and trust me, the dominant players will be moving around a lot, you'd hear the shot ring out!  If it's on target, a bunch of clean-up folks would then come out on the field and cart off the body.  He/she/it would then be replaced and the game would start up again.  Just like today after a foul.  Except with blood, doncha' know.  

And transgender players would be welcome.

BTW, this could "open up" as many as 8 additional player opportunities per game.  Plus new jobs as body carter-offers and cleaner-uppers.  Times 32 teams, and x 16 games.  Plus the Post Season.  Not to mention the 32 snipers, plus their back-ups.  You do the math.  

It boggles the mind!  

Wowzer, Batman!   We could literally double the opportunities for minorities in one fell swoop!  I'm guessing Rolls Royce and Bentley and Lamborghini would be big supporters of this plan!  Of course, we might have a slight drop-off in those anxious to play professional football.  Probably in direct correlation with their I.Q.  That'd be expected, given that the NFL would overnight become the single biggest cause of death among Black men between the ages of 21 and 35.  

But then again, there wasn't a drop-off in the number of Roman Gladiators willing to fight in the Big Show, now was there?  The Colosseum!  The Big Show!  Every athlete wants to make it to the Big Show, now don't they?  This would be an added "wrinkle," but I doubt it would seriously limit participation.  And since they've been pushed through school simply because they're all 7 feet tall and can mangle people, many won't be smart enough to run like bandits.  

And I seriously doubt their agents would tell them... 

P.S.  Go Chiefs!