"Observe and Report"

There are 1,272,400 security guards in America.

There were that same number last year, indicating it's anything but a growth industry.  Soon to be replaced by "A.I."  

These are the folks you see rambling around your local mall, looking bored, just praying for something to happen.  They are almost always unarmed, unless they work for specialized industries or for casinos on Indian Reservations.  

Oooopsie!  I meant "Indiginous Personages."

The average security guard in 'Murica makes a whopping $18.73 an hour.  Or about $36,000 a year, assuming they get full hours.  Just about the same exact amount we pay a brand new Army recruit.  They are everywhere.  The movie theater, the local Trader Joes, overnight at the car dealers, standing guard at the museums.  But here's what you may not know, and really need to know:

They are advised, INSTRUCTED, to "Observe and Report."  Only.   

Not pursue, assault, question, detain or arrest.  Just use their eyeballs to look for something out of the ordinary, and then notify the local fuzz.  That's it.    

As security guards are "unsworn" officers, you should know that anything more than "O & R" subjects their employers to full and complete liability.  Not just the security guard's agency, but the agency's employers.  $Millions in lawsuits have been filed, and won, when some 'roid-ranged guard goes full tilt and assaults a citizen.  Or even just violates their Constitutional Rights.  Like the 1st, the 4th, the 5th and the 6th.  

And another thing, I've dreamed throughout my storied life about one or another job or career.  Fireman, sniper, pharoah, pilot, bank robber, etc.  But I never, EVER dreamed of becoming a security guard.  And I'm guessing our current fleet of security guards didn't either.  I'm guessing most either still live in their parents' basements, or are retired mailmen/ women/other, and are looking for a little supplemenal income.  Meaning they're likely not qualified to do anything other than make a phone call and pass along the information. 

I might be a bit biased, but it seems guards I've seen are either pimply-faced kids trying to earn their way through junior college, or old, fat, and slovenly retirees, who are pissed at having to do this meaningless task, and show it.  

Oh yeah, one more thing.  I worked as a security guard while in college.  I had two jobs, signing on a radio station at 6:00 a.m. as a "rip and read" news and weather reporter, and tending bar at a local watering hole.  Plus going to college full time.  So I applied to guard the local Banquet Food Processing Plant in Marshall, MO.  I think it paid $3.00 an hour at the time, for just walking around in a uniform and turning a little key in their time clock.  Heavy, that sucker was.  About the size of a dinner plate and weighing in at about 20 pounds (this was in the '70's, before technological advances).  I was supposed to carry it from key to key, a hundred feet or so apart, to show the time I "clocked in."  So I did what life had prepared me to do: figure a way to do the job easier.  And quicker.  Even if a little less "kosher."

On my first pass through the plant after signing in at Midnight, I would gather up all the keys.  31 of them, if memory serves.  Located all throughout the block-square facility.  I'd then take the clock and the keys home and watch a horror movie or something.  I'd turn a key in the clock every so often to continue the ruse.  About an hour before my 12 hour shift ended, I'd return to the plant, replace the keys on a final tour, and turn in the clock to my replacement guard.  Worked like a charm, it did.  Oh, and I received "Employee of the Quarter," and a raise, plus all the frozen chicken meals I could appropriate.  Proving once again that rules are made to be circumvented.  At all costs.  

It's also called turning lemons into lemonade.  

Anyway, I write today to wish all security guards everywhere a really good day.  They need all the good wishes they can get... 

From the House of Rameses II.

This edition of the "Chuckmeister Chronicles" focuses upon one of my dearest interests.  Not politics, not guns, not cars, even:  Archeology.    

I suppose I didn't become an archeologist because it sorta' required one to dig in the dirt.  And knowing when you get up in the morning that you're going to go dig in the dirt all day is kind of offputing to me.  Given my 'druthers, I'd druther stay clean.  But finding neat old stuff and wandering around pyramids and ancient temples sounds just dandy to me.  Probably you too.

I suppose also my interest stems from the belief I was likely a pharoah in a past life.  Reincarnation, doncha' know.  Maybe even Rameses II.  He was the Big Guy.  Built more temples and such than any other pharoah.  Kicked major ass in Egypt's wars.  And he lived to be 90 in an era where peoples' life expectancy was about 30.

And if not a pharoah, a visier at the very least.

So you can understand that I've watched every TV show and podcast about this stuff.  And read all the stuff available on the Internet.  Probably more even than graduate archeologists.  So, being a Bishop in the Universal Life Church, and having the power to award (honorary) bachelors degrees, I hereby grant myself a degree in "Ancient Civilizations and the Stuff Those Folks Left Behind."

Now that my bona fides are thus laid bare for all to see, I have a couple of observations about ancient Egypt and the folks with whom they consorted.  First, we were always taught that the pyramids were tombs for pharoahs.  However, even though there are more than 100 pyramids in Egypt, and thousands of archeologists have been snooping around for 200 years, we've never found a pharoah entombed in one.  Not even a scrap of wood or cloth or leather, much less an arm or a leg.  

This brings us to the dominant theory at present:  they were power stations.  They were all built next to a river, so the ebbs and flows of the water could have been used to produce power.  Whether methane, or hydrogen, or even electricity, it's been proven they could have made their own power.   5,000 years ago.

Secondly, have you noticed there are no hieroglyphics on any of the walls of any of the pyramids?  The burial tombs in the Valley of the Kings are wall-to-wall heiros.  Not a square inch spared.  But in the pyramids?  Nothing.  Zip, nada.  I consider that additional evidence on the power plant side of theories.

Third, Have we noticed that there are no smudge marks on the walls and ceilings in any of those pyramids?  Or temples?  Once you take three steps inside of one it's as dark as the inside of a cat.  Can't see your hand in front of your face were it not for the occasional lamp.  Which gives us another check mark on the side of power plants.  They must have used something other than torches to light their way while building these enormous edifices.  And hieroglyphing the heck out of things.  

Electricity?

There are 2,300,000, 2 and 1/2 to 10 ton, custom-shaped limestone blocks in the Great Pyramid.  Imported from a quary 500 miles away.  Somehow.  Built to within .3 tenths of a degree to true Cardinal North.  Built on the exact geographic center of all the Earth's land masses.  To have built this enormous structure in 20 years, as we're told by archeologists they did, these ancient Egyptians would have had to place a stone block every two minutes, 24-hours-a-day, up to 481 feet in the air.  Quite obviously they knew something we don't.  Or have yet to learn.  Or re-learn.

And remember, the wheel wasn't invented yet, they had only copper tools, and no beasts of burden.

Although all of the hundreds of temples and burial tombs in Egypt feature floor-to-ceiling hieroglyphics, not a single one talks about how the pyramids were built.  Current thinking is because they inherited them from their forebears (see below).  And then put them to great use.  Perhaps even under the tutelage of friends from "High Places."  Ancient aliens theory, that.

Did you know Cleopatatra was closer in age to Steve Jobs and the I-Phone that she was the pyramids? 

Which brings me to my last observation.  For today.  It would seem from all I read and observed that we here on Earth went from a civilization that could build pyramids, and huge temples, and obelisks, and massive underground fortresses, straight to the Stone Age.  It took us thousands of years to begin to claw our way out of the Darkness and begin to rebuild from a natural disaster its thought occurred between 11,600 and 12,400 years ago.  A disaster so widespread that it virtually wiped out our species.  And most of the megafauna on Earth.  It's called the "Younger Dryas Theory" (look it up).  

In short, we were struck by several meteors that simultaneously melted all the glaciers, raised the level of the oceans by 400 feet, submerged thousands of villages on the Mediterranean Sea, and blocked out the sun from all the crap kicked up into the air.  It was dark for two years, they say.  And society quickly devolved. 

Oh yeah, and we learned from the writing of Plato that Atlantis was a real place.  It supposedly sank beneath the waves after an all-day, all-night thrashing.  Just about 11,600 years ago.  There's that date again. 

Perhaps these events even coincide with other Great Flood theories.  Every civilization across the Earth had one.  The travels of Gilgamesh foretold a civilization-ending Flood.  And 1,000 years later we can read about Noah and the Ark.  Or is it the same story?  

We were taught that society began in Assyria 6,000 years ago.  Before that?  We were all hunter-gatherers, they said.  Ooopsie!  The archeologists were all wrong.  Gobekli Tepi was just discovered in Southeast Turkey.  A huge grouping of enormous stone circles, surrounding 18 feet-tall "T-pillars" weighing in at 20 tons each.  And this sprawling city is only 5% uncovered, they say.  Did you know it's only a few miles from Mount Arrarat, the mountain upon which Noah and his Ark ran aground?  All this built by hunter-gatherers?  Not likely.  And ready for this?  It's carbon dated at 11,600 - 12,600 years.  That date ring a bell?  

We lost a civilization that had the ability to create these masterpieces.  We know that for sure 'cause we couldn't build 'em now.  With all our high-zoot technology, we couldn't build a pyramid.  Game, set, match.

The Egyptians have proof via their stone "King's List" that their society goes back 30,000 years.  The archeologists say its a myth.  There's a little clay tablet in the London Metropolitan Museum showing the names and terms of the kings of the 5 major Mesopotamian cities.  It goes back 30,000 years.

And while all this is going on, we've just been told that we humans go back 300,000 years.  They used to tell us 30,000 years.  Then 60,000.  Then 100,000.  Now 300,000!  Plenty of time for societies to form and evolve and advance and then blow themselves up.  And I do mean societies in the plural.  Look what we 'Muricans have accomplished in a short 200 years.  Imagine what we humans could do in 1,000?  And the society which follows ours?

Maybe the archeologists should dig a little deeper...

    

757,200.

 Didja' ever wonder why Joe (the "Mumbler-in-Chief") Biden chose to open wide our Borders and let the world pour in?

Everybody on the political "Right" wondered about that.  Seemlingly nobody on the political "Left" gave a sh*t.  

It's true.  Sadly.  about 12,000 illegals a day poured over our Southern Border.  They were met by our Border Patrol, who were ordered to welcome them with open arms.  And then hand them over to the "NGO's," or Non-Governmental Organizations.  

We, you and me, gave those NGO's more than $1.8 Billion Dollars over Biden's 4 year term.  To pay for all those hotel rooms, and meal tickets, and doctors appointments, and legal advice, and plane/train/bus tickets to anywhere.  

Virtually nobody was turned away.  Illegals from 156 countries knocked on our door, which swung wide open.  If you do the math on those 12 thousand a day, you'll come up with about 16,000,000 illegal aliens welcomed in.  Plus at least another 1,600,000 so-called "gotaways."  Those choosing not to accept all the largesse we were offering and run for the hills.  OUR hills.  One wonders if we won't hear from them again when the next building is blown up...

But why, one must ask!  Why would anyone permit that, knowing that we'll be paying for those illegals, and their families, forever!  All the educational expenses are on the horizon.  Expenses we'll not get reimbursed.  But why would anyone do that to America?  They can't claim ignorance, for all they had to do was watch Fox News, which covered it Every Single Day.  For 4 years.  

Well, Fellow Patriot, I have the answer.  I know why whoever was calling the shots for Biden chose to step aside and welcome millions from everywhere!  And here it is.

Our states elect a Member of the U. S. House of Representatives for every 757,200 residents.  That's why Wyoming gets one, even though it only has 523,300 citizens.  And Taxifornia gets 52, with the epectation they'll get many more once the millions of illegals come out of hiding.  

Because those "residents" need not be citizens, according to the folks who conduct our Census.  It's felt that whether they're legal or not, they need representation.  And they get it.  Just imagine upwards of 20,000,000 illegal aliens dispersed among those "Battleground States."  Which can be won during Presidential Elections by mere thousands of votes.*

Think about it:  20 Million Illegals equals 30 more Congressweenies.  Enough to sway future elections for decades.

Simply stated, the Democrats have so alienated their Base of late that they decided to import a new constituency.  Millions of illegals they hope to turn into voters.  In the belief those new voters will vote for them, in exchange for having graced them with that free ticket they were given to America and all its goodies.  And with the expectation of winning a new term in the White House last November 6th.  And every 4 years thereafter.

But reality bit.  Donald J. Trump won.  And immediately closed down the Border.  And is now hunting down all our felons and deporting them.  While all the Lefty judges keep on trying to frustrate that plan.  And all the Lefties in Congress try to paint these efforts as racism, sexism, ageism, and "fascism," of course.  Without even knowing what that word means, most likely.

New York and Taxifornia each lost a Representative as a result of population decline during the last Election.  They're terrified of losing more, else the Republicans would have a lock on D.C. legislative control for the foreseeable future.  And so they cheated.  And they're squealing like a stuck pig now that they got caught.  And that The Donald is trying to deport their illegals.  And the "Legacy" Media is trying to cover their tracks.  

Keep your powder dry, Fellow Patriots.  The Civil War clock is ticking down pretty close to 12:00 a.m.  

*   The 2020 General Election tilted toward the Democrats.  They won, even though 7 Battleground States went Dem with a total of less than 75,000 votes.

Some Interesting Statistics.

There were 16,029 murders,* by firearms, in America during 2024.  The last year statistics were available from the FBI.  

There are 341,000,000 Americans. we're told.  Plus another 30 or 40 or 50 Million illegals, give or take.  But we don't talk about them, doncha' know.

There were 30,000 deaths by firearms in Mexico during the same year.  They admit to that number, although it's accepted that there might well have been twice that many.  That's because Mexico's population is deathly afraid of those who might kill them for reporting murders to the police.  

Mexico reports 109,230,000 citizens.  Not counting those Millions and Millions living illegaly in America.

America has more than 78,000 gun stores.  More than all the McDonalds, Wendy's, Burger Kings, Arbys and D.Q's put together.

Mexico, on the other hand, only has one, ONE, gun store.  And it's located inside a heavily-armed military installation in beautiful downtown Mexico City.  And it's open from 10:00 a.m. to 2:00 p.m., Tuesday - Thursday, only.  And one must fill out a bunch of paperwork to get the approval to enter.    

Oh yeah, only shotguns and semi-auto pistols and rifles in .22 caliber are available for purchase.  Nothing more powerful is offered.  That's as a result of a 1972 reform to their Constitution's Article 10, permitting them to confiscate all other firearms.  And they've done so.  Their army and police have confiscated a total of 343,000 firearms since that revision. 

We have the 2nd Amendment to guarantee us the right "...to keep and bear arms."  The Mexicans have the right to buy a .22 and hunt squirrels.  And they'll confiscate anything else.

The FBI tells us there are more than 525,000,000 legal firearms in America.  It is unknown how many guns are in circulation in Mexico.  They don't report that statistic.  But there are enough for the cartels there to have killed at least 30,000 of their citizens in just one year.  It's estimated more than 100,000 Mexicans have been murdered by gunfire since 2020.

And we know that the shortest measurable unit of time is no longer a "quark."  It's now that period of time between a shooting, and Chuck Schumer and his other Democrats scrambling for the nearest microphone to call for "gun control," and "gun confiscation."  Which they've been doing for decades.  Without success. 

So how is it, I ask, do firearms get the blame for mass shootings in America, and not the people who use them, as it should be?  And why do we have so few firearm murders by population as compared to Mexico?  

Once again, 16,XXX - 341 Million, vs. 30,XXX - 109 Million?  Are those fun-loving Mexicans six times more likely to gun you down than would the average American?  Or are they six times more prone to being murdered because they're unarmed?  Shouldn't we congratulate ourselves on being so careful with our firearms?  And then send Schumer and his ilk to the showers? 

In closing, the Mexicans say 80% of their guns are illegally imported from America.  And thus, they blame America for Mexico's gun violence.  Not themselves, mind you, us.  Seems to me our friends down south are engaging in a bit of transferrence here, doncha' think? 

*  The FBI reported some 18,433 suicides using firearms during 2024.  There were no suicides by firearm statistics reported from Mexico during 2024, or any other year.  

Gravity Sucks!!!

I'd like to confess to you, my Fellow Patriots, that I never concerned myself with gravity when I was 15.  Or 25.  Or 40, even.

But as I've succeeded in living longer than a White male is supposed to live, I've discovered that gravity has been taking a toll on my life.  Along with aches and pains.  

And by "gravity," I mean, that mysterious force which makes it almost impossible to now get up off my ass.  And keeps me from picking up anything off the floor smaller than a $20.  And to keep my balance whilst trying to walk.  And I do mean, trying!  

I had to use a cane after my 3rd spinal fusion.  That was in '10.  But I still ambled along at a pretty fair pace anyway.  But when the 4th and 5th back surgeries came along, I needed TWO canes to venture from "A" to "B."  And I do mean venture.

I would introduce my bright purple canes to people with a nice "Purple cane, purple cane" ditty.  I tried to foil Ol' Man Gravity by making fun of him.  A thinly-disguised effort, I must say.  Even telling others that walking with two canes is fine!  Normal, even.  And that I'm not ready to spring for a walker.  You know, those clunky-looking contraptions used exclusively by "old people."  "I'd have to turn in my man-card," I would say.  But that decades long wrestling match with the Ol' Man has resulted in the Ol' Man now winning.  I just sprung for a walker.  

Even though it will hopefully permit me to venture out more often, maybe even a restaurant on occasion, and likely serve as an insurance policy against falls, I still feel sort of funny taking it out in public.  That's because I'm a 25 year-old guy held hostage by an octegenarian.  But embracing reality now proves necessary.  And so I have.

Oh yeah, the walker's a bright purple...  

Time For Change...

It's finally time to change a few names.

Since Big Orange decided to puke forth an Executive Order changing the name of that body of wa wa down south to "The Gulf of America," I decided to look into a few others we might reasonably change.

You may not know it (what with the paucity of real readin,' writin,' and spelling teaching going on 'round here), but we won the Mexican-American War.  

We won it back in 1848.  And the results are memorialized in the "Treaty of Guadalupe Hidalgo" that same year.  And we stole, er, took as the spoils of war the western half of of these here United States from them as a result.  Most of California, all of Nevada, and Utah, all of Arizona and New Mexico, a piece of Colorado, and some of Oklahoma.  Plus all of Texas, formally spelled "Tejas."  

And that's the subject of this spleen venting.

We should have then changed all those Mexican (Spanish) names in the territory we claimed.  Failing to do so left the impression in those highly impressionable Mexicans that it was bizzness as usual.  That they had every right to continue emigrating into the U. S. of A.  And since the Border was the Rio (Not So Grande) River, they could get here easily if they could wade.  And we made it easy for them by maintaining all those Mexican street and village and city and town and state names.  For shame.

"El Pueblo de Nuestra Senora la Reina de Los Angeles del Rio de Porcuncula."  

That's the official name of Lost Angeles.  Is there any doubt it would be a magnet for all those "unapproved" Mexicans?  And San Francisco?  And Santa Monica?  And Santa Barbara?  Wouldn't it be better if those names were changed?  And all those states above named which have retained their Spanish names?  

What started all this was a doctors appointment.  I asked the guy at the doc's office for his address.  He said "Avenida de Missiones."  I looked it up and it's a dead end street featuring exactly zero missions.  

So I decided to offer up some suggestions for change.  Along with a new motto for each.  Here they are:

     -  Utah:  "Mormon"  "We're all super nice!"

     -  California:  "Reagan"  "Where women are women and half the men are too"

     -  Arizona:  "Melt"  "Hotter than a four-peckered goat!"

     -  Nevada:  "Lose"  "The only way to double your money is to fold it over and put it back in your pocket"

     -  New Mexico:  "Indigenousville"   "We like the 'old' better." 

     -  Texas:  "Rodeo"  "THE destination for all disaffected Californians!"

     -  Florida:  "Sweat"  "THE destination for all disaffected New Yorkers!"

     -  Colorado:  "LoveToSki"  "Where Lefties go to offload their wealth!" 

NOTE:  I do not recommend we change all the Mexican street names.  Waaay too expensive, doncha' know.

We need to start by changing L. A.'s name to "Washington West."  And SanFran's name to "Hamilton."  And Santa Monica's to "Franklin."  Simpler, classier, historical.  And maybe then the Mexicans will decide to locate in Chicago, or Baltimore, or New Yawk City instead.  And since they're turning socialist, they would probably welcome all those new mouths to feed... 

     

         

Something I Find Amazing.

You know what I find amazing?  So amazing that I often congitate upon it?    

I'm amazed that NFL football stadiums are able to routinely pack in the crowds come game day.  55,000, 60,000, even 75,000 like Cowboys stadium.  Are there that many people with disposable income sufficient to score a ticket to one of these games?  Because the average of all stadiums is $455.00 a ticket. 

The cheapest is an invitation to see the Cleveland Browns.  $151.00 a ticket.  Guuuuulppp!

And we all hear about the price to see a playoff game, right?  $1,000 a seat...up.  

The last Super Bowl charged their obviously overpaid fans a whopping $10,900!  For a ticket in nosebleed alley!

Are these folks all drug dealers?  Plastic surgeons?  OnlyFans models?  I continually hear those on the left bitching about how rotten the economy is, and how POTUS is ruining their lives.  But they have to have a pretty damn good life in order to pay an average man's weekly gross wages on a ticket to see overpaid, undereducated sweaty, room temperature I.Q. brutes play a stupid game.  Running in to each other at full tilt.  With too many rules.  And too many referees.  

An inside lineman on the Ravens just signed a multi-year deal for $105,000,000 a year.  That's about $300 Grand a year.  Wha.....?  Not a QB, not a wide receiver, not even a fullback!  A friggin' inside lineman!  

Do you realize that if we paid these otherwise unemployables say, $2,650.00 a game, plus health insurance, the beer wouldn't cost us $11.00 for a 12 oz. cup, Jerry Jones would be selling life insurance, and your ticket wouldn't cost $455.00.  

It's a stupid game.  I watch every game every weekend, BTW, but it's a still a stupid game.  Thank God for my trusty fast-forward.  I start watching the game 30 minutes late, and then FF through the stroke-inducing commercials... 

Go Chiefs!