Monday, August 25, 2014

Eureka! It's going to flow money!

A 6.0 earthquake hit Napa, California yesterday.  Old buildings crumbled, folks were thrown out of bed and inventory wound up on the floors of convenience stores and restaurants throughout that portion of our Once-Golden State.

But I have a feeling that most of the glass that fell and broke yesterday was filled with Dom Perignon.  And most of the bottles of wine that fell and broke at the 800+ wineries in the area were library examples of their very expensive, older $250 wines.  Only.  Just the very expensive ones broke, don't you know.  It works that way when you're getting ready to fill out your insurance claim.

In fact, I'd say there's a better than even chance that more Opus One fell and broke yesterday than Opus One has ever made.  Why?

My guess is that only about 12 older farmers, the ones who put Napa on the map, still remain.  The rest of the winery owners are Hollywood movie producers and directors and Bay-area hedge fund managers.  They're the only ones who can afford to buy those expensive vineyards and wineries. Example?  A smallish 3 bed, two bath home in Napa and environs is $1 Million Plus.  Too rich for normal folks.  So the moguls are the only ones who can afford to be here and the only ones who will know how to make a natural disaster such as this pay off.  And BIG!

I would predict that within the next day or two the Golfer-in-Chief will declare Napa and the surrounding area a Natural Disaster.  Why?  That's because he's come here and scooped up millions on multiple occasions over the past few years from the socialist billionaires who own and operate this town.  That will mean the Treasury Department will go into overtime-mode and print up, oh, I don't know, maybe about $41.5 Billion Dollars and ship it out to Central California.  

Therefore, I predict that the only people who will take it in the shorts are the little guys who couldn't afford and didn't have insurance.  Even so, it will be the insurance companies who will wind up buying the wine that fell on the floor.

What then?  Natural Disasters equal big losses to insurance companies, which will then send off an email to the Treasury Secretary, who will give them a no-interest loan to restoke their coffers, which Barry will then unilaterally forgive with a stroke of his famous pen at some point in the future.  Maybe just before he vacates the Oval Office.  So the wineries will get repaid up-front by the Feds, and then again via loans to expand, and the insurance companies will smile as well.  Not bad, huh?

So, those wineries who were on the fence, just barely making it from the sale of their $100 bottles of Cab Sauvignon, will reap a windfall.  And those businesses who weren't protected will wind up having to cash out and move out.  They'll then have to sell their properties to the billionaires, enabling them to consolidate their holdings to even more of Napa.  See how this whole capitalism - peppered with crony Progressive Liberalism - works?  

I thought you would...

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