Protestantism is "Sect-sy."

German priest, astronomer, lecturer, writer, historian and all-around trouble maker Fr. Martin Luther did us all the favor of publishing his famous "Concordat at Worms."  

That's German for the list of 95 demands he made by nailing them to the gigonda wooden door of the Cathedral at Worms, Germany.  

Pronounced "Vorms."  Heavy on the "Vo."

Anyway, Luther opened up Christianity to Christians.  Previous to which there was one choice: the Catholic Church.  And they would burn you at the stake if you happened to mumble something about the Earth not being the center of the universe.

Luther was constrained by the limited teaching the Church was doing by failing to make the Bible available to the common man.  The "Flock."  They kept it to themselves, even delivering sermons in Latin.  Which almost none of their flock spoke, read or wrote.  But they had to attend mass or be branded a heretic!  So Luther blew it all wide open.  

Basically making Christianity available to just about anyone's interpretation.  Leaving us with...

More than 3,500 denominations.    

All the way from those who kiss snakes while high on mushrooms, and speak in tongues, to the most Conservative Baptist congregations who are afraid to whisper during services.  Or be seen buying a bottle of bourbon, lest they be seen.  The horror!  And anything in between.  Know the difference between the Methodists and the Baptists?  The Baptists have communion once a month.  Methodists offer it weekly.  That's just about it.  Really.

Most of those in between, the mild to the wild, are reflections of the charisma of the preacher.  And how he or she (or it) interprets the Bible.  Most of the really big Christian churches are led by famous preachers.  Who develop congregations of 25,000 or even more.  Like Greg Laurie.  Or Mark Driscoll.  Or Joel Osteen.

Who have private jets and live in mountaintop mansions.  

Right now there are 32,187 Protestant churches.  Of varying denominations.  Whether Lutheran, or Methodist, or Baptist, or Latter Day Saints, or even 7th Day Adventists, they are all Christian churches.  Because they purportedly worship Jesus Christ.  Sort of a necessity if you're a Christian church.

And there are also 3,119 Catholic Churches.  Whether small, community based, or large cathetrals, there's a Catholic church nearby for everyone.  And some of them are really Conservative, still offering sermons in Latin, or super Liberal, with a house band and video feed to the masses. 

Oh yeah, and there are 348 mosques, if you're of that flavor.  And most aren't in Arkansas or Colorado.  They are clustered in the Big Blue cities, where their adherents chose to locate.

You may be unfamiliar with the story of King Henry the Eighth.  He married a young babe named Anne Boleyn, hoping she would produce a male heir for him by the following year.  It was a political thing.  She didn't.  Despite him doing his part, often, she didn't do her part and give him a male heir.  She even had the temerity to push out a girl!  For shame!

So the King asked the Pope for approval to annul their marriage so he could get about the task of porculating some other babe.  The Pope said the King and Queen should go to counseling instead.  The King was so pis*ed he started the Church of England.  His own little Church! Which was exactly like the Catholic church, except you can dispose of ex-wives/husbands without difficulty.  You have a "Get Out of Jail Free" card to give marriage a try.  And if it doesn't work out, no harm, no foul!  You get a Formal Dispensation!  And Hank could even be his own pope! 

You see what I mean about the differing denominations? 

Oh yeah, Hank had his undivorceable babe beheaded right outside the Tower of London.  For all to see.  Just a bit over a year after their grand wedding.  Conducted in the very same spot as the beheading.  Hank had a real flair for public relations, didn't he?   

It was dangerous being a Queen back then...

But I still find it interesting that until October 31, 1435, there was but one choice.  Catholicism.  In Latin.  After Martin Luther nailed up his list of demands, we now have an almost infinite supply of Christian churches.  

If you're in the market, I'd stop by a Christian church a day until you find one you like.

And if you can't find one that suits you, you can always start your own!