"Markle-Free" News

Put simply, I could use some Markle-free news.

And some JLo-free, and Ben-free, and every other celebrity who infests my computer.  

That's because I watch the news a lot.  I admit to that, given there's not a whole of other stuff available for an older guy to do.  An older, "mobility challenged" guy, as Queen Elizabeth II used to say.  And since I can't run and jump anymore, and can't afford to go out of my house and actually purchase anything, watching the world unfold via my 70" bigscreen TV from 8' away is a pretty good second choice. 

And what I'd like to know, from you, my Fellow Patriots, is if you know of a news channel that focuses on, you know, the news.  Like it used to be.  And still should be.

I mean I'm looking for an Internet news channel that does not post a "Breaking News" every time Jennifer Lopez takes a dump.  Or her used-to-be, then-was, and now used-to-be-again husband Ben drives anywhere near that other Jennifer in his life.  That he was, and then wasn't, and maybe now is, his girlfriend.  Or future wife.  Or steady squeeze.  Or psychiatrist.  Or confidant.  I don't know, and I don't care.  That whole "Bennifer" thing made me want to puke.  It also took up about 20% of the entire new feed.

Please, a news channel without Bennifer!

And then there's that whole Harry and Markle thing.  She hunted him down like a lion hunts a wounded gazelle.  She saw him as a black widow sees a fly.  And she brought him down.  Using her no doubt terrific feminine wiles.  He's a big dummie, who leads with the wrong "head."  She's a predator.  And everybody but him knows he's the most pus*y whipped dude on Earth. 

She made him try and bring down the Royal Family because she wasn't as glorified as Kate, and he wasn't going to be King.  He was the "Spare," after William.  Just in case Will dropped dead.  Or maybe needed a kidney.  So why not just bolt from all the selfless duties accruing to the Royal Family and open up shop in Montecito, she was thinking?  In a cozy little $11,000,000, 9,000 ft. mansion.  And then try and make bank off her "title."  Which King Charles could take away in a heartbeat.  

And should.

So where can I find a news channel without these losers?  They are whiny, whimpering ex-nobody's who play themselves as the victims.  To a citizenry who are going into bankruptcy trying to feed themselves.  And we know different.  Markle will dump Harry the instant he's no longer a Michelin 3-Star meal ticket.  And then write a book about how she was terribly mistreated by the Royal Family because she's "Black."  She'd be gone the instant he ever lost that title.  Which his daddy will never do.  If for no other reason than it would unfairly punish his grandchildren.  So we'll have a "B-List" TV sort-of-Star in exile, and a long-suffering near-King, always complaining about the way it should have been.  Had his zygote been hatched first.  Or had she caught Will before Kate did.

It's tough to be almost great...  

And it's also tough trying to learn what's happening in the world when these turkeys keep clotting up your TV set.  DM me if you know where I can get the news without getting a dose of Markle or Ben...