Please Taxifornia, Secede!

A recent Independent California poll tells us fully 58% of Californians believe "they'd be better off" if their State were to "peacefully secede" from the Union.

And that they'd prefer that California "keep a good relationship with the rest of the Country."*  

How nice!

Now, if you're not from here (pat yourself on the back), that statistic might surprise you.  But those of us Taxifornians who still try and pretend we live in what used to be America aren't at all surprised.  That's because 47% of Taxifornia's citizens are registered Democrats.  Only 23% are registered Republicans.   The remaining 30% are sprinkled across the political landscape, with a heavy dose of socialists, communists and Marxists.  And lots of LGBTQ2S++123ABC's.   

Just so you know, Taxifornia has 54 counties.  47 of them are owned and controlled by Democrats.  Giving the Democrats a "Supermajority" in both the Assembly and the Senate.  Which means they can propose and pass, and BoyGuv ("Hairgod") Newsom will sign, the dumbest, most inane, stupidist, most ignorant and foolish laws imaginable.  

Example?  Sure.  These bozos passed a new law raising the MinWage by 25% to $20.00 an hour!  For asking, "Would you like fries with that?"  Forcing the fast food store owners to reduce hours, close dining rooms, raise prices beyond what consumers can pay (97% have increased their menu prices), or even go out of business.  Does that sound like what intelligent leaders would do?  Or maybe they just don't give a sh*t.

Another one?  Sure.  One more.  BoyGuv just signed a law making cars sold in Taxifornia after 2030 "honk their horns" if they pass on the road, or are passed, by somebody going 10 mph or more faster than the posted speed limit.  And then apply their brakes, automatically, to bring them to within "compliance."  "Road rage," much?

One more?  Absolutely.  Firearms purchasers are now charged an additional 11% sales tax, on top of the current 11% sales tax, solely because Democrats don't like guns (the puss*es!).  Oh, and they can...

1,234 legislative bills were passed by Taxifornia's "Supermajority" Legislature in 2023.  976 of them were signed into law by our BoyGuv.  3 brand-new laws a day.  Yeah, astounding.  Look it up if you doubt me...  

But back to seceding from the Union.  Just think about that.  58% of these entitled individuals believe that leaving the Union is a good idea.  And 61% of those respondents say they think they'd be better of without America, and America would be worse off without California.  

Let's take inventory here.  139,453 homeless vagrants are clotting up our streets and alleyways.  Fully 30% of all of America's homeless.  And according to the V.A., 39,800 of our military veterans living as homeless.  On our streets.  And receiving no special consideration whatsoever.  Not even from the Veterans Administration.  They're left to look after themselves.  

They looked after us, and we should be looking after them.  

And interestingly, to prove just how "strong" and how "big" Taxifornia is, Chevron just announced it's moving to Texas!  Leaving Taxifornia and its high taxes and burdensome regulations behind.  They're joining Tesla, and SpaceX, and Charles Schwab, and Oracle, and Hewlett-Packard, and CBRE, and McKesson, and Toyota, and another 100 major corporations as they seek greener pastures.  Knowing that any pasture will be greener.  

And sales and auto registration taxes are also the "biggest" in the Nation!  Something to be proud of, BoyGuv?  House prices?  The "biggest" in the Nation!  And gas prices!  The very "biggest" in the Nation!  Gas prices here average $5.84 a gallon!  More than $2.00 more than the National average of $3.81!  And I'm running out of exclamation points!

So here's my thinking.  In addition to finishing Trump's wall across our Southern Border, which the Democrats stopped, I think we should build an additional Wall between America and the CA, OR and WA.  All the way from the Meheeeekan Border to the Kanadian Border.  And we should require passports and a giant fee for them to get out.  We don't want them exporting their Liberal tendencies to 'Murican towns and villages if we can help it!  

These states are a bunch of whiners, anyway!  Stew in your own juice, you losers!  Stay on your own side of the fence!  Buh bye!  Go!  Got it?  Eh?

Dayummm, that felt good!  

*   Poll respondents also offered that "they'd be terrified at the prospect of another 4 years of Trump."  Absolutely terrified.  Perhaps unaware that Trump had been POTUS for 4 full years just 3+ years ago, and didn't destroy democracy.  Or end the United States.  Maybe they were all stoned while Trump was POTUS?  Maybe their brains are so dope-addled that they don't remember.  Reminder:  He lowered taxes, and reduced illegal immigration, and lowered your food and gas and car prices.  Oh yeah, and no wars!  But Taxifornians have been smoking some of that legal dope we sell here, and may not be aware we even have a POTUS!  And that might make them even more likely to support a secession...