The Darwin Awards.

I have long advocated for culling our herd.  

You know, figure out some way to "remove" gracefully all those miscreants who are screwing it for the rest of us.  The fools and criminals and bums and thieves and rapists and murderers that cause all the trouble and consume all our resources.  The 3% of us who need to be taken out and shot.

Well, maybe not shot.  But having a harsh talking-to, at the very least.

Anyway, I'm a fan of the "Darwin Awards."  Google it if you aren't yet a fan.  I dig these guys because they highlight the most stupid, the most foolish, the very most ignorant activities undertaken by other members of the Homo Erectus family we could well afford to do without.  And they publish the winner annually.  

Each year's story is a hoot, but the one that most sticks in my aging mind was from 1999, I believe.  It had to do with a gentleman from Minnesota who'd just finished purchasing a brand-new Ford F-150 pickup truck.  And to celebrate, he headed off to his favorite pub to meet up with his buds to knock back a few...Buds.  

Which he did.  Perhaps a few too many as it turns out.  Because it was in the dead of winter and the nearby lake was frozen over, so he decided to go ice fishing.  He and his dog Shep drove his new pickup out on the ice.  Way out.  Being too drunk and too lazy to actually cut a hole, he decided to take the quicker method; a stick of dynamite.  

He pulled out the dynamite with a 30-second fuse, lit it, threw it as far as could out on the ice, jumped back in the truck, yelled for Shep to follow him and drove back toward the edge of the lake.  

To await the "Booom!"

Exceeppppttt, Shep was a bird dog, and he ran after the dynamite!  He picked it up and ran as fast as he could back toward our mentally-challenged fisherman.  The guy started yelling at Shep at the top of his lungs for him to stop!  It scared the dog so much he ran under the truck and hid.  Our fisherman ran for his life as the dynamite exploded!  Boom!  A gigantic hole opened in the ice, the truck sank into 12 feet of water, along with what was left of poor dead Shep.

Many, many pieces of Shep.

Our fisherman had owned the truck for less than 6 hours and it was now totaled.  He received a DUI and a ticket for cruelty to animals.  And to top it all off, his auto insurance company wouldn't cover the loss on the truck and he still had 60 payments to go...

It's nice folks like these that really need to be taken out of the gene pool.     

Nomsayin'?